Day 75 ! Booiaka - Aroundthefitnessworldin80days

July 1, 2014, 8:32 am

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LAST WEEK! LAST WEEK! Phew-ee, I can hardly believe it's Day 74. I tried googling "74 days" to see what notable things take 74 days to happen...any gestation periods for weird animals, the scientifically proven time for some food, pill, diet to take effect, the number of days it takes to walk from London to somewhere perhaps but all I got was "74 days from today - what day is that", "74 days since last period help? - Yahoo! Answers" and other equally pressing questions that people have asked google. The Internet is so wonderful but can also bring out the weird in people, it must be said.

It was in fact, back on Day 24 Tai-Chi where I said I was going to try a Booiaka class (though I misspelt as Bookiaka, which, by the way, made it tricky to find when I had said I was going to try this class). And here we are 50 days later (Google results include "what happens to an apple in 50 days" and a blog on "50 Dates in 50 Days"), task completed, promise fulfilled.

I had no idea what Booiakawas about. Aquaterra's trusty website sold it as "Fresh from LA! An intense cardio workout incorporating vibrant dance moves of Latin, Brazilian, Jamaican, Reggaeton and hip hop styles..." and true to it's advert, it was indeed a fusion style dance cardio workout.

I was happy to see that the class was taught by the same Instructor Topaz from Day 32 Zumba Toning - I remembered that class as a fun-filled, friendly class and this Booiakawas much the same in the respect. We went through a few warm-up moves to good current tunes before Instructor Topaz moved onto the routine. The routine itself was made up from relatively simple steps, taught at a good, slow pace which meant that everyone in the (wide age-ranging) class could get comfortable with the moves. A benefit of this routine being easy to follow was that Instructor Topaz didn't have to spend too long breaking down each move so the class could spend more time running through the routine, thereby increasing the cardio burn.

It was a light-hearted routine but it is Instructor Topaz' energy that makes the class fun. Constantly smiling throughout, she kept us smiling and the time passed quickly. It's very much more a dance cardio class and not a straightforward dance class - if you're looking for a dance class that focuses more on fun and energy than strict technique and style, this one's for you!

Class done on Tuesday, 16 July 2013 (11 months delay ain'y bad). Full blog post and pictures can be found here.

The Need To Know:
- Where: Islington Tennis Centre (Part of Aquaterra)
- Nearest Station: Caledonian Road & Barnsbury Overground (10mins)
- When: Tuesdays 20.30
- How Much: Drop-in around £7.50 for single class

The Want to Know:
- Who's it For: For those who fancy a light-hearted dance cardio class
- Sweat Scale: 7/10.
- Strength / Cardio / Flexi / Tone: Toning and some cardio
- Complexity: 5/10.
- Fun Factor: 7/10.
- Changing Facilities: Showers, toilets, changing rooms
- Instructor Inspiration: 7/10. Still happy cheery!

The Stats:
- Total Time: 45mins
- Calories Burnt: 167. Works out at 3.7 calories-burnt-per-minute
- Average Heart Rate: 98
- Max Heart Rate: 140

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Day 76 ! Unpacking - Aroundthefitnessworldin80days

July 1, 2014, 8:32 am

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I moved house yesterday. I won't lie, I did it the way one can do most things with greatest ease and minimal stress - I paid someone. Oh the shame! Not really, moving is a such a p.a.i.n. When the Boy and I moved in together a few years ago (3yrs, 5 months and 12 days), we verged on breaking up whilst trying to get the Ikea sofa up the stairs.

Was the £100 (not even discounting for wear and tear) sofa worth that argument that almost ended years of loving, sweet relationship? Hell, no. But at that point in time, I remember thinking clearly that if we couldn't work together to maneuver that sofa up those stairs, what hope did we have in the future? How would we deal with other major decisions? Marriage? Children? And why didn't he understand that the sofa was really heavy and I was trying to move it round the corner without scratching the walls? You've heard of Bridezilla? Try Movedusa. Moveatron? Move-igfoot? Ah, nothing has quite the same ring.

But, it turns out while paying people to pack and move for you does reduce your work and stress, you'll still get stressed anyway. Are they packing it right (yes, they are professionals)? Will they put stuff in the right places (not always)? Will everything fit up the new stairs (no, was the sad conclusion)? Why did we paint the hallway walls before moving furniture up the stairs (god knows)?

And when all the boxes (all 103 of them, not including our own boxes, suitcases, trunks etc.) are stacked up throughout the house and the packers leave with a smirk on their faces, that's when the realization sinks in that you now have to unpack. And you can't pay someone to do that for you (well, you probably can but you would have to tell them where every little bottle, decoration, piece-of-paper-you-didn't-actually-want-to-keep-but-they-had-packed up-anyway) goes. So I drew the line there and unpacked myself (the Boy was at work). And you're torn between unpacking like crazy so you get it all done as quickly as possible and falling in a heap over a box and sobbing that there are too many boxes and it'll never be finished. Then, during an exasperated call with L'il Sis, she suggested I stick on the heart rate monitor and write a post about unpacking. It'd be interesting to see how many calories one burns unpacking, she said, and though it's not technically a class, it's something everyone will do at some point. She may be L'il but she sure is wise, so, here we are!

The stats are below - to keep in line with a class, I recorded just an hour of unpacking (it took w.a.y. longer I assure you) and in hindsight, it wasn't the most intensive hour of unpacking. When I started, I was running up and down the stairs moving files, ornaments, clothes and whatnot. It was sweaty work - sweaty enough to make me sport a stylish 80s sweatband and tuck my t-shirt up (ok, I may have danced a little between boxes).

All in all, unpacking is decent exercise - taking into account that you're doing it for a good few hours for a good few days, having intense bursts of moving boxes to find something that is obviously going to be in the last box you open and inevitably be moving around constantly, I would say its analogous to an all-round low impact cardio class with little bursts of strengthening exercises.

Said unpacking was actually done on Wednesday, 17 July 2013. Full blog post and pictures can be found here.

The Need To Know:
There is nothing you need to know

The Want to Know:
- Who's it For: For those who are moving (good luck and god bless!)
- Sweat Scale: 6/10. On average
- Strength / Cardio / Flexi / Tone: Light cardio and strength
- Complexity: 3/10. Most complex thing is figuring out where you want everything to go.
- Fun Factor: 1/10. Stick on some tunes and make it less painful.
- Changing Facilities: Depends where you're moving to!
- Instructor Inspiration: 10/10. Obviously.

The Stats:
- Total Time: 62mins
- Calories Burnt: 123. At 1.98 calories-burnt-per-minute, it's 8th last on the leaderboard. But calories-burnt per session would be impressive!
- Average Heart Rate: 69
- Max Heart Rate: 105

How 'The Lord of the Rings' Is a Metaphor for Depression

July 1, 2014, 8:33 am

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While watching The Lord of the Rings movies for the millionth time, I discovered something: Frodo's struggle with carrying the ring of power is a metaphor for life dealing with depression. The ring is heavy, burdensome, & drives people to act in ways they normally wouldn't. The ring acts as depression does. Frodo harbored it for a very long time, and it plunged him into a darkness so deep that he couldn't remember the taste of food, the sound of water, or the feel of the grass any longer; all he felt was "naked in the dark" with nothing to shield him from the evils of Sauron, the master of all that is awful in the world. He acted out in ways that were uncharacteristic of him; it was the power the ring had over him. As soon as he was rid of the ring, he was free; it was as though he woke up after a long hibernation full of terrible nightmares. The look of relief and light that flooded through him reminded me of how I feel when I start breaking through my own periods of depression. He could feel again. He could breathe again. He saw the world as himself again, and he was at peace and happy...despite being stuck on a rock surrounded by lava in the ruins of Mordor. He realized how far away from himself the ring took him, and the fact that he could feel and know his life, memories, and happiness again was the most uplifting and reassuring notion he had in a very long time. He had been a prisoner of the dark and was now free to feel the light.

Notice the motif of light used in The Lord of the Rings. The Light of Elendil, given to Frodo by Galadriel, was a light for him in the most dire and hopeless of times, like when he fought off the giant (and hungry) spider that tried to kill and eat him. The spider, an instrument of evil, was scared off by the light. Orcs, Sauron's disgusting and horrific soldiers, couldn't run in the sunlight; the sun's light repelled them. Gandalf's light from his staff warded off the Nazgul to save the soldiers of Gondor. The light from Gandalf's staff also shone before him as a beacon of hope at Helm's Deep when the Riders of Rohan showed up at the last hour to spare Rohan defeat and ultimate destruction. The light brought hope when no one had any left. Every time light appeared in the movie, it felt like you were being enveloped in a warm blanket of safety and security. It meant relief, calm, peace, love, goodness, and hope. It meant seeing life again.

Light and dark, happiness/relief and depression--they run in parallel; they are so much alike. When the veil of depression lifts, I feel like I can see things I haven't seen in a very long time. I not only see light around me and see more clearly, but I actually feel lighter, as though a heavy weight has been lifted off of my heart. When I watched Frodo's reaction after shedding the weight of the ring, I realized I had a deeper connection to him than I had thought.



Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/HeadAboveWaterLifewithMoodDisorders
Blog Site: LifewithMoodDisorders.blogspot.com

Images: 1st: Parisvega.com, Google Images, 2nd: Boldognapot.hu, Google Images

How I Turned My Unhappy Past Into a Happy One

July 1, 2014, 8:35 am

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I was brought up in an agnostic house- my parents were not particularly interested in religion and made it plain to us three children that we could do whatever we wanted. In a sense I am grateful to my parents who both came from relatively liberal families and were not that ingrained with God and the rest. Many authors and creative types bash on endlessly about their upbringing and how their parents ruined their lives. Suffice it to say in my case that I had a fractious and unhappy relationship with my late mother and a loving one with my late father. I do not think that it would be fair to say that my mother didn't love me but put it this way, she never really noticed me. My mother probably did the best she could with a willful child but my sensitive spirit never recovered from my mother's harsh hands and words. I've learned though after 50 years that we're all unique yet so similar in our unhappiness.

La merde, oil on canvas, painting and photo copyright S. van Dalen
For the last six months I have been in and out of the some of the most diverse homes in the country. I have met with all types of people- all different colours and religions. They all share something in common- a desire to open up about their lives and to tell a complete stranger their most private thoughts. How this has come about that I illicit confessions from strangers, well perhaps this could be a new career for me. I have listened to the stories of these individuals, some of whom despite the fact they have been living in this country for thirty years, can still only speak halting English. And everyone has a story to tell. Who on earth has not suffered in some way? The most common story I heard was from women who wished they could ditch the husband for good, walk away and never look back. The second most popular story was the illness that had ravaged lives- the engineer who developed MS, was now living on disability benefits and who had lost his confidence, the former bus driver whose allergies were so severe she couldn't breathe and lived off an oxygen tank, the stroke victims who one day felt fine and the next were incapacitated and maimed for good and who cursed God every day. I've heard it all- the couples who had struggled for years to conceive, went through IVF only to split up once the child was born, the women whose husbands left without explanation, the housewives who secretly despise themselves, the polio victim who had competed in the Paralympics and met his perfectly formed future wife as a result (he never thought anyone would love him), the ravages of loss- stolen property, stolen dreams, stolen money. Why do strangers seek to share their story? Because there is a camaraderie between humans - we all crave solace but without the reflection we see of ourselves in someone else it is almost as if we do not actually exist. To be able to empathise and care is what makes us human. Often these strangers tell me that I seemingly have it all. I smile and assure them that no. Who does?

Photo copyright S. van Dalen
I'm not perfect and I couldn't be anything further than. I'm flawed and I struggle like everyone else. My secret weapon though is philosophy- spending hours just thinking, reflecting and placing my faith not just in God but in myself. I do believe that everyone should study philosophy and learn how to think. Just yesterday I interviewed an astrologer on my radio show and she was discussing how she helps her clients gain confidence in order to be able to cope with life. I am frequently alarmed at how fragile people actually are as if there is a tremendous dearth of soul within them. And yet we are all capable of being strong- we're definitely not born that way- we have to learn from hard knocks how to be brave. Ironically, a warrior is the most bruised and (secretly) vulnerable person you will ever meet.

And finally, what do I tell these strangers about where my journey led me? How did I recover from my unhappy family history? Philosophy teaches one to make sense of why we are here but it was nature that saved me. It was a type of pleasing calmness and tranquility within my soul as I walked in the woods and looked up and around me as I had always done for years and in all weathers. My healing began when I finally heard the silence within my own head. A completeness that was enough, an acceptance of who I was and that no fanfare and trumpets would follow my going out or coming in. The breath of the hound as he lay at my feet, the dewdrops on the leaves, the cyclical nature of everything- and the ephemerality of what irks us and pleases us too. Those lessons were all there as I trampled my way though the woods and as we do through life without heeding what we need to learn. But it wasn't anything man-made that taught me the most important lesson of all; it was the rhythmical cycle of nature that showed me the inevitability of all things. Sadness turns to joy. And a broken spirit can find wings again.

Photo copyright S. van Dalen

I Really Don't Want to Look at My Vagina - Or Yours

July 1, 2014, 8:42 am

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One sunny morning last week, I came across this website: The Labia Library.

As you can imagine, this isn't a library of books about labias, but instead is a collection of pictures of women's genitals to reassure women who may be wondering if their vagina is 'normal' or not.

As I logged on, I let out an involuntary squeak.

I felt really uncomfortable looking at this, and wanted to immediately clamp my hands over my eyes. Then I wondered if the problem was me, not these velfies (or vaggies?) that these women had taken behind closed doors.

Perhaps I just had a major problem with close-crop labias, and maybe this was the harbinger of some much deeper body image issue.

After all, it has taken a long time to overcome my body shyness that I blame on being Asian and therefore genetically prudish and conservative. While this may seem blatantly stereotypical, I can count on one hand the number of Asian women I've seen stripping off in the gym changing room (make that one pinkie).

And don't get me started on bikinis - we tend to wear the fugly Speedo one-piece numbers rather than a twinset. It took me to the age of 25 to have the confidence to wear one, ironically missing out on my peak years back when I didn't have to work out to get a flat tummy.

But I digress.

In a bid to overcome my cultural shackles, I decided to be more open and to care less about what other people thought. Maybe I would've even 'checked out a book' at the Labia Library had the following not happened.

I went for my first ever colposcopy appointment a few years ago - for the uninitiated, it's a pre cancer-screening to monitor the HPV virus - sort of like an extended smear test but with a vag-cam that shows your cervix up close and personal.

The doctor asked: "Would you like to look at your cervix?"

I smiled and said firmly: "Thanks, but no thanks."

She asked me a few more times and then said: "It's really quite beautiful."

Now, dear reader, there are lots of things I consider to be beautiful.

Puppies, a double rainbow, blossoms in the middle of spring.

But my cervix ain't one of them. Frankly, I was aghast. There it was, pulsing away, tissue, goop and all, and I don't feel that because I got to look it in the eye, we have a better relationship. I'm convinced that one day it is going to grow eyes and become sentient, issuing orders from below deck.

In fact, I was quite resentful that I clearly stated that I didn't want to look at it, but the doctor almost shamed me into it, as if I wasn't accepting of my own body.

A few months ago, I came across the Beautiful Cervix website that is meant to make women less insecure about their own cervixes. I admired the principle but still found the site gross to look at. A few months after that I had another colposcopy appointment where again the doctor suggested looking at my cervix and I had to say about five times in an increasingly high-pitched and screechy voice that I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO.

Since then, what I've worked out is this.

I think it's really important that a la Judy Blume and Sex and the City, young girls acquaint themselves with what's going on down there because a) there's a lot to learn b) it's tucked away like origami and c) some cancers eg vulval do present symptoms that are evident to the eye.

Also if you don't, you end up having a situation like Orange Is the New Black where half the inmates thought the 'pee-hole' was also the vagina.

However, what I don't like is this guilt-trip, from the doctors examining me or other people who find it weird that I wouldn't want to look at pages of vaginas. Or worse, that in some way this makes me weird.

If I don't feel the need to look at rows upon rows of sphincters to be comfortable with my digestive movements, then quite honestly, I think the same principle should apply to the front of house.

Thai Retreats: Point Yamu by COMO, Phuket

July 1, 2014, 9:08 am

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Overlooking the Andaman Sea and with a horizon view of the majestic limestone karsts of Phang Nga Bay, Phuket welcomes the new-kid-on-the-island hotel scene with open arms.

Point Yamu by COMO offers 106 rooms and private villas, with a collection that are for sale if you understandably can't bear to leave. The resort also boasts an impressive 100m swimming pool with awesome views, albeit split into three sections, so no Olympic training in this pool, a COMO Shambhala Spa Retreat with eight treatment rooms, including a beauty treatment room and yoga studio offering, well, yep yoga and Pilates.

Just a 25 minute car ride from Phuket International Airport, this slice of opulence is located on the east coast of the popular Thai holiday island and rest assured, you're well away from the crowds yet close enough to Phuket Old Town for some sight seeing, wonderful bars and restaurants.
COMO's grand entrance bears testament that Phuket has still got what it takes as a hub for ultra luxe hotels and there's a lot more to come.



The Room
There's plenty on offer including pool villas, but for such a short stay with much to do we opted for the Verandah Suite. The room has a sea view; and with floor to ceiling glass doors and windows our view looking out to the sea was nothing short of fantastic. The bedding was donned in pure white 500 thread Egyptian cotton, which in the tropics is therapeutically cooling.

The interiors are all the grand designs of esteemed Paola Navone and she's really dressed up this rather large and industrial looking building in mostly earth tones with a signature fresh blue and startling white décor. There's nothing traditionally Thai style about the feel of the place, it's revitalizing and bright, a perfect accompaniment to the colours of the sea and sky that envelop you just about everywhere.

The bathroom is large and has a walk in rain shower as well as a deep stand-alone bathtub. The COMO Shambhala bathroom amenities are rich in quality and the energizing scents of geranium and peppermint are irresistible, we certainly recommend purchasing the larger bottles and essential perfume oils from the spa to take home.

Room facilities include a couple of flat screen TVs; a dining table, comfy sofas, a verandah with a small table and a couple of sun loungers, a guest powder room, free Wifi, a mini bar with the usual fare, and a Nespresso machine.



The Spa
It's practically unheard of to come to the world's spa epicenter and not indulge in every treatment available and to be frank, the prices are reasonable for the quality of the treatments available. Offering eight treatment rooms and four Thai massage alcoves, all therapies draw from Asian traditional massage and medicine.



The Treatment
Stepping into the spa area didn't feel so different to the room ambience, decked out in blue tiles and white furniture, the spa feels slightly clinical, yet in a purifying and good way.

The 'Como Shambhala Massage' was the treatment of choice. Described as a nurturing massage and using their signature-blended oil to calm the mind and rejuvenate the body. The male masseur, Khun Mit was exceedingly expert. Using grape seed oil, his movements were all precise and not typically Thai massage like, he used long, purposeful extended movements from toe to neck and making use of his palms and arms rather than a finger pummeling massage, which I admit I have grown accustomed to in Thailand. The massage wasn't as strong as I usually opt for, but it certainly achieved what it promised and I felt very relaxed indeed after 75 minutes.

The second treatment I opted for was the 75 minutes 'Como Shambhala Purify Holistic Facial'. This signature facial is cleansing and nourishing. The beautician, Khun Sonya, used hot compresses throughout the treatment that I found to be extremely calming albeit in the humid climate of Phuket you'd assume otherwise. Sonya explained that the compresses help to cleanse and prepare the skin to be balanced through manual lymphatic stimulation. This, to me, translated to a fabulous arm and neck massage to help drain my lymphs and to detoxify the skin through acupressure channels. My slightly sun exposed face enjoyed a brushing, polishing, creaming and steaming and with the application of the several natural products I left feeling fabulous with glowing and hydrated skin.



Other Treatments Include
Deep tissue, reflexology massages, detoxifying baths, exfoliating and sun soothing treatments, traditional Thai massage, Thai abdominal chi massage, full body steam compress massage. Facials include; Guinot hydradermie treatments and facials specifically designed for men too. Manicure, pedicure, and waxing is also available.

Spa Products
COMO by Shambhala products

To Eat
All COMO resorts offer the Shambhala wellness menu and I have to say, this menu is the main attraction. A menu brimming full of living breads, fresh fish, gorgeous salads, juices, raw food and a plethora of gluten free options, making this little celiac very happy.

Dinner was enjoyed at the Paranaken Thai restaurant, 'Nahmyaa'. The offerings are varied and there are some really interesting Thai twists. The highlights were the lamb massaman curry and the wagyu beef rib, which to be honest was a little on the small side for the price. Cocktails were a little hit and miss; they've still got a little way to go to refine them. Avoid the Fighting Duck unless you really, really like the taste of smoke, safer option is the Third Date, a pleasant blend of tamarind, vanilla, Grand Marnier and vodka. The server recommended the durian pancake and ice-cream to us, and it was as you would expect durian to be, she even confessed that when she eats the stinky fruit she gets a migraine, this was a cause for amusement and she gladly swapped our dessert for something a little less pungent.

'La Sirena' is the poolside Italian restaurant and is open for the epic breakfast, lunch and dinner. It offers great views of Phang Nga Bay and the lovely swimming pool in addition to a menu of yummy wood-fired pizzas and seafood, pasta, salads and antipasto dishes. Back to the breakfast... you'll not be disappointed. All juices are fresh, including young coconuts, beetroot, pineapple and much more. The buffet element is small, featuring freshly baked pastries and breads, antipasto, fruit, seeds, nuts, homemade jams and yoghurts and cereals. The al la Carte choices for the breakfast are delicious. I tried the gluten free bread, which was the best I have ever tasted with the buckwheat pancakes with candied papaya, orange and palm syrup, and cashew nut cream. Also on offer is quinoa porridge, egg white omelettes, and real toast, the latter being a raw food offering with an avocado spread, really tasty stuff for those who like their wellness and spa cuisine. For those who enjoy a more calorific breakfast, don't despair, there's a lot to choose from including sausage, eggs and bacon, as well as sweet waffles, coffee and eggs Benedict.



Don't Miss
The complimentary trip over to the beach located on a nearby small island, Koh Rang Yai. The experience of being taken over by Thai traditional boat, a long tail with the small son of the driver really added to the whole 'Thai' adventure. The island itself is tiny with a small restaurant and bar with a few radiant peacocks walking around. Sun loungers are not permitted on the island, but the resort has padded out the deckchairs with comfy fluffy towels and the seawater is clear and perfect for a snorkel and swim.

Words: Natasha Eldred

The Deal
Point Yamu by Como offers rooms, suites and villas from £164 to £384 per night*.
It's wise to check out their website for offers and promotions including a nights stay at the COMO Metropolitan in Bangkok if you're flying in to the Kingdom's capital.
Spa treatments are available from £50* and the Signature Treatment (75 mins) cost £75* and the facial cost £70* per guest.
(*Subject to exchange rate).

Getting There
Phuket International Airport is served by flights arriving directly from Europe, the Middle East and Asia as well as plenty of domestic connections to Bangkok and other popular Thai destinations. The car journey from the airport to the hotel is about 25 minutes.

There are no direct non-stop flights from the United Kingdom to Phuket. However, up to seven flights per day carry passengers between London and Bangkok, or you can fly direct to Kuala Lumpar or Singapore and then Phuket is a short one-hour flight away.

Expect the flight time to take approximately 18 hours including changes.

Thai Airways (www.thaiairways.com)
British Airways (www.britishairways.com)
Qantas Air (www.qantas.com)
Malaysia Airlines (www.malaysiaairlines.com)
Singapore Airlines (www.singaporeair.com)

www.comohotels.com/pointyamu

www.the-spa-spy.com

'What's the Problem?'

July 1, 2014, 9:15 am

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I was much too far out all my life And not waving but drowning -

Stevie Smith, Not Waving But Drowning

Dennis Stevenson is a well-known British businessman, and has occasional bouts of depression. This is how he describes them. 'I once broke my leg in ten places. As I was taken to hospital, someone shut the door on my leg. You can imagine the pain. But I can tell you the pain of depression is many times worse: it is excruciating.'

Mental pain is as real as physical pain. It is experienced in the same areas of the brain as physical pain and is often more disabling. Yet these two types of pain are not treated equally. While nearly everyone who is physically ill gets treatment, two in three of those who are mentally ill do not. If your bone is broken you are treated automatically, but if your spirit is broken you are not.

This is a shocking form of discrimination, which occurs in every healthcare system in the world. It is particularly shocking because we have very good treatments for the most common mental health problems, which are depression and crippling anxiety disorders. The treatments - modern psychological therapy and drugs when appropriate - are not expensive. And the economics are striking.

Treating mental health problems produces extraordinary savings - fewer people on welfare benefits, and fewer people being treated for physical illnesses made worse by mental illness. So on any reasonable estimates the treatments pay for themselves. They cost society nothing. And yet they are provided to under a third of those who need them. That is a great injustice and a gross inefficiency. And it is the main reason we have written this book - the pain of untreated mental health problems, and the fact that they can be treated at little or no cost.

There is also a wider issue. The last fifty years have seen enormous progress in advanced societies - less absolute poverty, better physical health, more education, and better housing. And yet in the USA, Britain, and many other countries, there is almost as much misery as there was fifty years ago - at least as many social problems and more family conflict, more crime, and more anti-social behaviour. Dealing with the externals of income, education, physical illness, and housing has not been enough to produce happier or more orderly lives. We have left something out - the inner person. Mental health is something that requires deliberate cultivation and expert help when it goes wrong. If our society had better mental health, we should all gain. That is the second reason we have written this book: the huge social cost of mental illness.

The facts we lay out are in many cases quite remarkable - indeed after many years in the field some of them still amaze even us. So here are the main questions we investigate.

How many suffer?

Mental illness is the great hidden problem in our societies, so most people are amazed when they hear the scale of it. In Britain today one in six of all adults suffers from depression or a crippling anxiety disorder. The same is true in the USA and in continental Europe.

Roughly a third of families currently include someone who is mentally ill. So when people ask us what we work on and we say mental health, the reply is almost always, 'Oh, my son..', or 'my mother...', or sometimes, 'I have to admit that I...' but then usually, 'And please don't tell anyone.' (This is particularly true when it's a politician.) In America, more people commit suicide than are killed in road accidents.

Mental illness is not only common, but it can be truly disabling through its impact on people's ability to care for themselves, to function socially, to get around, and to avoid physical and mental pain. In that sense, depression is on average 50% more disabling than angina, asthma, arthritis or diabetes.

So here is an extraordinary fact. When the World Health Organization measure the scale of illness and allow for its severity, they find that in rich countries mental illness accounts for nearly 40% of all illness. By contrast, stroke, cancer, heart disease, lung disease, and diabetes account for under 20%.

Mental illness is extremely difficult to adapt to - much more so than most physical illness except for unremitting pain. So it is terrible for those who experience it. But it is also bad for business, since it gives rise to nearly half of all days off sick. And it is bad for taxpayers, since mental illness accounts for nearly half of all the people who live on disability benefits.

Given all this, you would think that mental illness would be high on the priorities of every government's department of health. But not so. In 2007 we met with Britain's new secretary of state for health after he had been in his job for three weeks. At the end of our meeting he said, 'Something has struck me. I've been in post for three weeks and gone to about forty meetings, but I have not so far heard the phrase "mental health".'

The situation is similar with employers. In January 2012 the World Economic Forum was having its usual snow-bound con- ference in Davos. This included a meeting of the Workplace Wellness Alliance - a group of sixty of the world's most enlightened employers. The meeting was about the health challenges facing employers, and there were detailed presenta- tions on cardiovascular disease, diabetes, lung problems, cancer, and musculoskeletal issues - but there was nothing on mental illness, even though it causes so much sickness absence. People just don't want to talk about it.


Thrive: The Power of Evidence-Based Psychological Therapies, by Richard Layard and David M Clark, is published by Allen Lane on 3rd July 2014, priced: £20. Available from Amazon

Richard Layard is one of the world's leading labour economists, and in 2008 received the International Prize for Labour Economics. A member of the House of Lords, he has done much to raise the public profile of mental health. His 2005 book Happiness has been translated into 20 languages.

David M Clark, Professor of Psychology at Oxford, is one of the world's leading experts on CBT, responsible for much progress in treatment methods. With Richard Layard, he was the main driver behind the UK's Improving Access to Psychological Therapies programme.

Blondes Earn More Than Brunettes And 17 Other Interesting Facts About Fair-Haired Women

July 1, 2014, 9:30 am

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Did you know that blondes earn more money than brunettes? That the largest proportion of natural blondes live in Europe? Or that blonde hair extensions cost more than any other colour? No, neither did we.

Watch the video above for more interesting facts about blondes.

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Arianna Huffington: 'We Shouldn't just Compete For Top Jobs, We Should Redesign The World Of Work'

July 1, 2014, 9:43 am

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Arianna Huffington on changing the way we think about work and how we define success.

The Summer of Bubble-Gum Nails

July 2, 2014, 5:37 am

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The summer of bubble-gum nails: that's how my husband has christened this summer's fashion for brightly coloured nails -- try soigne botanique polish in Kyoto or Vodka if you want to see what we're talking about.

But it's not just nails which are focussed on colour this year. It seems to be everywhere. Two weeks ago I was in Paris for a presentation on the 'history of the 20 years of the Channel Tunnel' at the British Ambassador's residence. Not the place I expected to see colour but I couldn't help being drawn to the window of the Gucci store as we approached the Rue du Faubourg. It was filled with magenta trousers and orange jackets. On my way back of course I arrived at St Pancras International station to see David Batchelor's huge sculpture - Chromolocomotion - hanging on the Terrace Wires up above the platforms. The simple shapes and gentle, contrasting - and often sun-kissed - colours provide an illuminating backdrop welcoming people to the UK at the end of an international trip.

Our cultural life too is focused on colour - my last blog centred on the Mondrian exhibition at Margate's Turner Contemporary which has colour at its' heart.

The July edition of Wallpaper* has a lovely spread about Lubna Chowdhary's ceramic tiles showing her with solid orange, red, blue and green and yellow tiles in her studio. Not just that but simple shapes in the firing of the colour onto the tiles -- mostly in circles.

Simple shapes and bold colours are also the stuff of the Matisse cut outs at the Tate Modern -- hanging from the walls as they hung from his studio or on the walls of a convent. The National Gallery has also dedicated its exhibition to colour and different pigments with sparkling minerals and crushed insects.

Even pop star, Pharrell Williams (the pop singer of the year?) gets 3D colour due to the fact that he has synaesthesia. This means he hears in colour because of a neurological connection which causes his senses to become confused.

This isn't therefore a summer of light strips with neon colour - it's much gentler than that. Varnish, paint, pigment, fabric, tunes - this is how colour is coming through to us now. It's softer and warmer. Perfect for a British summer.

What Not to say to a Woman in her Thirties

July 2, 2014, 5:38 am

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I was reading an article today about being in your mid thirties. How, according to a 'recent survey', in your mid-thirties you are likely to be financially secure, at the peak of your career, a home owner, probably married with at least one child. And there's me thinking cutting out booze in the evenings every other week was progress. 

I was especially interested in the article due to it being my birthday in a few days' time. Not an especially significant year but one that will, indeed, see me use the phrase 'on the right side of forty' more regularly than in past years. I am, according to said survey, at an age when I should be most satisfied with my life. Fulfilled, content and happy.

Living the dream, no less. 

It's fair to say that I am not unhappy with things as they are. I could hardly be used as a poster girl for Generation 'have it all' but I'm still alive, and for that, I am grateful. I also have a total inability to maintain an adult relationship, regularly skip breakfast, and still consider myself to 'not really have had a drink' the night before if I consumed anything less than a full bottle of wine. 

I phone ex-boyfriends when I'm drunk, I can drive, but prefer not to because I am dreadful at it, live off M&S ready meals because my cooking is almost as bad as my driving, read gossip magazines, am scared to open any post in a brown envelope and spend a disproportionate amount of time talking about boys and sex or moaning about the lack of both.

In essence, we can conclude, I am not exactly the person I expected to be at in my mid-thirties. I thought I would be a survey result, a glistening example of adult contentment. How expectations fool us.

Despite my utter failings in the 'what to be by the time your 37' list, it was not this that unnerved me in the twilight of my 37th year but an unexpected email from man on a dating site I'm a member of.

I make no secret of the fact that I prefer older men to guys my own age and state quite clearly on my profile that I would rather be contacted by men over forty. (OK, fifty - so shoot me, I have Daddy issues.) You can imagine, then, my surprise, nay horror, when I received the following - 

Hi,
I really liked your profile, I'm looking for someone mature and sophisticated. Age is only a number for me, it would never put me off, in fact I find it quite a turn on. Would like to get to know you more ... 

(Rob 24)


There are three significant ages in a woman's life. Milestones, if you will. The first time she is finally able to buy a bottle of wine without getting asked for ID when she is young - the first time she is offered a seat on the bus when she is old, and the first time she is called 'mature and sophisticated' by a 24- year- old accountant from Surbiton because she looks like a sexy version of his mother.  


I am that age.  

I am the age when I am fancied 'despite' it and should take this as a compliment. What next I wonder, 'I'll take you out but if anyone asks will you say you're my aunt?' 

There is a reason I do not fancy younger men - this is it. 

On a plus note, I have a birthday party to look forward to next week and plan to get exceptionally drunk and partake in inappropriate sexual behaviour with a total stranger in a pub toilet somewhere in central London before laddering my tights, telling my friends how much I love them 25 times and striking up conversations with total strangers on a night bus home going in the total opposite direction of my house.

Mature and sophisticated? When hell freezes over.

Stop Blaming Advertising for Your Alcohol Abuse

July 2, 2014, 5:40 am

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So you drink too much. and your kids drink too much. But it's definitely not your fault though. Right?

Bullsh*t.

The biggest reason we have such a prolific alcohol abuse problem is because we refuse to take responsibility for our own actions. The reason that any attempts at sobriety are so protracted is that we are actively encouraged to lay the blame at everyone else's door but our own.

We get to blame being British. We get to even blame the area we come from within Britain. We get to simultaneously blame poverty and booze being so cheap, (it can't be both, make your mind up.) We have a healthcare system custom-built to take the consequences of our actions. A police force tailor-made to bear the brunt of our social behaviour. If we develop a habit of addiction then we get to call it a disease. Everyone looks after us, so we don't have to.

We expect actions without consequences as a basic human right.

But the most dangerous theory. The one that is so massively indicative of where we are failing in tackling alcohol abuse by far is this: that advertising is brainwashing us into consuming massive mounts of alcohol. It's a very convincing lie. I bought into it for years.

It seems true, it has all the elements of a smashing theory. Evil conglomerates spending millions pushing its products into our homes, (although it can't be working out that well for them since only this week Newcastle Brown Ale are offering to pay us to watch their ads). Onto our poor unsuspecting children. Infesting our sporting events and leisure activities. I used to rail hard against it. And whenever I did I felt a niggle I chose to ignore.

And that's the dangerous part. Assuming truth and not examining personal instinct. That's the kind of behaviour that keeps alcohol abuse rife and sustains people in a place where they feel powerless to stop drinking.

Because the truth is if you work in media and sport, (and I tend to) then you are fairly bombarded with alcohol ads and sponsors. Way more than out in the real world even. I've also been sober for 9 years. If alcohol advertising was the mastermind alcohol abuse prevention charities claim it to be- then I would have been reaching for the bottle/can/glass with every ad break.

No?

Okay then possibly it's not that effective. But I would have been craving a drink of some kind. Surely there would be a physical response on some level?

No?

Right. Fine. Maybe I was just overriding the physical stuff. But I'm constantly surrounded by alcohol ads at work. They would definitely find their way into my subconscious. I'd find myself thinking about drinking. Gravitating towards the alcohol aisles. Daydreaming about it?

No.

If you make it your business to build a life that is so full that you don't need alcohol anymore. Then you don't need alcohol anymore. If you make it your responsibility to learn new tools and like new things? Then the responsibility for what you filter for mentally becomes yours too. And you will sub-consciously filter for what interests you. And when you finally stop drinking long enough to get to know who you really are? You will never let anybody try and tell you who you are and where your personal preferences lie.

Advertising doesn't work if you know who you are and what you want. It's no one else's responsibility to decide that for us. Sadly in Britain we do live in a society that teaches us otherwise. But if you an ignore that and decide to make it your business to be in charge of yourself? Then you will be successfully sober, irrespective of external influence.

What about young people though? Surely they are influenced by what they see in adverts?

No. We got that wrong too. For a change.

Teenagers and young adults do way more online viewing than we do. And when they do that they skip through the adverts to get to what they want. They've also grown up in a time where they are so saturated with product placement and advertising that they are way more desensitised to it than we are. We can spend yet more money on research that tells us findings to the contrary.

Or we could have an actual conversation with them.

And this is the crux of our young adult alcohol abuse issue: We are terrible communicators. The single most powerful tool we have to combat any other form of influence over our children and alcohol we refuse to use. The one thing advertising cannot do is answer back questions in real time. Kids have questions. Lots of them. If they are too afraid to ask them? It's because we are teaching them our own inadequate communication skills. If we teach them the dangers of cheap booze. The consequences of alcohol abuse and it's pitfalls. Through word and through physical example, then the power of advertising is negated.

If we teach young people to ignore a society that wants to keep them trapped in this behaviour by shouldering the consequences of their actions. Show them instead that by taking personal responsibility for their actions themselves, not only will advertising have less effect on their choices but they will be far less likely to ever abuse alcohol in the first place.

The choice is ours. We can continue to make more programs that point fingers away from us. Pay for more research that tells us it isn't our fault. Waste time tweeting our smug outrage at everyone else. Or we can do the one thing that guarantees long-term sobriety and less alcohol abuse across the board.

Take personal responsibility.

Today.

Let is start with us.

Wake Up Your Entrepreneurial Genes

July 2, 2014, 5:41 am

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Having written in my last post about the 9 Steps to Reinvent Yourself - how to lead a more fulfilled life by undergoing change from time to time - Stonehenge's reinvention as a musical instrument brought a smile.


And with reinvention still on my mind, I was particularly interested to come across a report from The Centre for Entrepreneurs, Migrant Entrepreneurs: Building Our Businesses, Creating Our Jobs.

Whatever your take on the current wide-ranging immigration debate, the report makes for some motivational reading.


Migrant Entrepreneurs, or 'MigrEnts' as they are being called, are people who really do reinvent themselves. From another country and often a completely different culture, alone and without knowing anyone who cares about their welfare, they still manage to set up in business and make it a success.


In fact, the report reveals that migrant entrepreneurs are setting up one in seven of all new UK companies, and have much higher levels of entrepreneurial activity - 17% of non-UK nationals have launched their own business as opposed to 10.4% of British-born individuals. They also go into business younger, so have an average age of 44 as opposed to 52 for 'native' entrepreneurs.

More often than not, they start with far more challenges in comparison to the rest of us.


You are almost certainly well-educated, quite possibly with a university degree that has equipped you with an excellent foundation of knowledge and skills - theoretically that's a pretty good starting point.


Also, as an experienced professional you are used to the demands of meeting targets in a high-pressure environment and are able to produce a good standard of work consistently.


Your career to date has exposed you to knowledge, events and experiences that give you an insight that others don't have, so you're at an information advantage.


You're also in your comfort zone, living in a country whose culture and values you understand, rather than far away from your own country and your own family, where the strangeness of everything can seem bewildering and overwhelming.


You speak and write English fluently, so you can communicate effectively with others. Many immigrants have to learn the language from scratch.


Thanks to having had a good career to date, you have a credit history, and probably some savings, which could make borrowing funds either to start a business, or to 'featherbed' you while waiting for money to come in from your first clients, easier.


As a native, you're accepted socially, rather that regarded with suspicion or distrust because you 'fit' others expectations.


When it comes to starting a business, all these things put you ahead of the game. So if MigrEnts, can overcome all these obstacles and still succeed, what could you do if you tried?

Of course, one major reason why many of them succeed is simply because they have few other options.


You do. But are you really happy using your talents working for others in an unforgiving corporate environment, enduring the inevitable poor work/life balance, and continually worried about possible redundancy (an issue that hasn't gone away yet, despite our emergence from the recession)?


I want you to ask yourself why you aren't in business for yourself. Be honest with your answers.


Is it because you haven't thought of that 'killer' idea?


The good news is that while it would be great to have one, you don't actually need it. For instance, many very successful businesses these days were based on their owner's hobbies or interests, which has then enabled them to serve a niche market particularly well. If you really are short on ideas, just sign up for our newsletter as this will push your entrepreneurial genes and train you to see where opportunities are hidden.


Is it because you think becoming an entrepreneur is too much of a challenge?


If so, that's probably just your corporate background talking. But we can help you shift your thinking so you develop the entrepreneurial mindset needed for business success. We've done it many times for others.


Is it because you think you don't have the necessary skills?

That may be true, but you can learn them, just as you've done with everything else you know now that once was all new.


Is it because you're risk averse and don't want to take the chance of leaving 'secure' employment?


The truth is, no job is secure any more. When you work for a corporate business, someone else is always calling the shots and that means your job isn't safe at all. That's why so many across the corporate sector are still being made redundant every month.


Is it because others are depending on you and you feel that you have to battle on with a job you no longer like, no matter how miserable you are, to meet their expectations?

Well, you don't have to make the move from employment to entrepreneurship in one big leap. Many of our clients make the transition in a controlled way, often by running an online business in the background before leaving their job.


Or is it because you're someone who struggles with taking action?

Even if you are making decisions all day long at work, sometimes it's difficult to take action for ourselves. If this is the case, then having a third party like us to hold you to account for your actions, could make a big difference when it comes to moving you forward.


If the prospect of enduring never-ending commutes, long office hours and paperwork catch-up weekends, constant stress and increasing pressure seems easier than having a go at creating a financially rewarding, fulfilling future for yourself, where you're the one in control, that has to be your decision.


But if you would love to swap one for the other, or at least begin to explore how much better your live could be, then sign up for The Corporate Escape newsletter and be inspired by the insights and ideas we will share with you.

Ready To Take Action?

What's been the main reason why you haven't yet considered starting out on your entrepreneurial journey? Let us know in the comment box below.


And if you have enjoyed this article, then please share it with others.


Looking for more inspiration from the Award winning author, speaker and coach Maite Baron, then download 2 free chapters from her Nautilus 2014 Award winning book Corporate Escape The Rise of the New Entrepreneur. With the bonus that you will receive her weekly thought provoking updates. Get your download here.

Speaking Ill of the Dead

July 2, 2014, 5:42 am

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I am an outgoing, lively person who stands up for herself, at times a force to be reckoned with, so how could I let myself be bullied for six years? To compound the issue the bully in question died and I have felt obliged to honour and defend his memory ever since. And that is twenty long years.

The bully in question was my husband, and I loved him very much. He was a larger than life character, always had a plan for fun and adventure, full of the 'bad boy' appeal that some women seem drawn to. I loved his company and was never bored but I was never totally relaxed.

My husband cheated on me all the time. He told me that at 5'8" weighing just over 9 stone, I was fat and ugly. On my week day off from work he would come home and don a pair of white gloves and run his fingers over the tops of doors to make sure I had cleaned the house properly. If he found my underwear drawer not to be arranged in piles of white, black, etc he would empty it onto the floor so that I would have to tidy it. If I said or did anything to upset him he would pin me up against a wall and scream at me. One night we had friends over for supper and I had made some terrible gravy. While our friends laughed about it he took me into the kitchen and held me off my feet by my chin and told me he was ashamed of me. He gave me £10 a week pocket money and I had to write everything I spent that money on down in a notebook, and I daren't buy anything to wear without his approval. I earned more than he did but all the money in my bank account went on the mortgage, car loan and council tax and there was virtually nothing left. There is more, but it's a long time ago now.

My husband was in the military working alongside the Special Forces and told me that he could not tell me anything about his work, where he was going or what he was doing. Other wives seemed to know where their partners were but I was happy to be in ignorance because I didn't want to know the truth. He was away with work for about 6 months of the year, and would write to me everyday he was at war or on detachment as there were no mobile phones in those days. While he was away he used the time to enjoy the company of other women, once even managing to infect me with an STD on his return. When he pushed me around he blamed PTSD after the first Gulf War, but he was like it before he went.

While he was away I could relax, leave the house a little untidy and eat what I liked. I could go out with friends for a meal and not be told what I could have off the menu in case I gained any weight. I maintained a strict exercise regime so that when he checked my running times and calories burned on the heart monitor after exercise I didn't fall behind. It was easier to do 4 aerobics classes a week and run 30-40 miles a week than have a row about why I didn't want to. I once ran 6 miles on a torn calf muscle rather than be told I was a wimp and making a fuss about nothing.

His behaviour towards me explains a lot about the way I behaved after he died. I had to prove I wasn't fat, ugly or unattractive so I slept around, spent far too much money on clothes and makeup and carried on dieting and exercising madly. I could never trust any boyfriend I had and would press the 'destruct button' on my relationships very quickly rather than find myself vulnerable and hurt.

When he died I didn't know what to think. I missed him terribly, but there was, and this is very hard to admit, an underlying sense of relief. I had an honourable way out of a ghastly situation. I didn't have to admit to everyone I had made a mistake. The man I loved, who was a total shit to me at times had just died. His last words to my face were, "I don't want to go away, I love you so much." At his funeral two women felt able to send single red roses with messages of their undying love for him and I had to hide them under another wreath so that his parents didn't see them. Every year since I have messages of love and condolence from mutual friends. They have no idea.

"One should never speak ill of the dead."

Style Confidence

July 2, 2014, 5:44 am

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Without doubt, the power of fashion lies in its strength to communicate. We can use this power to promote our identity and to reinvent ourselves as well as give us more confidence. Our appearance is the primary basis for others' opinions of us and what we wear can impact our cognitive abilities.

For many people achieving confidence through fashion is easier said than done.

Style confidence refers to how confident we feel about our clothed appearance. According to research, when we feel good in what we're wearing we show it in our body language: our posture changes and this communicates positive signals to others. Posture and clothing instantly communicate information about the wearer to others. Opinions based on our appearance are formed in less than one second, and these judgements are not just about how attractive (or not) we are. First impressions, based on appearance, extend to character judgements. A good deal of evidence has shown that attractive people are perceived as kinder, more honest and more intelligent. The reverse is also true. Interestingly, clothing doesn't only communicate to observers, it can also affect our mood and impact our cognitive processes. A recent study found that participants' attention span increased significantly when wearing a white lab coat that was described as a doctor's coat as opposed to a painter's coat. This is also demonstrated in performance when wearing a costume helps the performer take on the character of the role and suggests that we should dress more for how we want to feel than how we do feel.

If we want our clothes to show our uniqueness, we should try to find the styles that work for us as individuals; the clothes that make us feel more 'style confident' rather than those simply follow fashion trends. Of course, the styles that work for us will vary according to many factors including the specific occasion and what we hope to achieve in that situation and beyond. However, when we find the styles that work for us, we are being authentic and showing our uniqueness. Others find authentic people more attractive and in turn this builds our confidence. It allows us to reinvent ourselves, promote our unique identity and authenticity.

Tk Maxx's Me. By Me. campaign aims to promote individuality and unique style, championing a more realistic ideal in fashion by using real shoppers of all ages, rather than professional models to promote their campaign. For style inspiration and to join the conversation visit mebyme.tkmaxx.com.

Follow TK Maxx on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TKMaxx_UK

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Lack Of Sleep Can Make Brains Age Faster And May Increase Risk Of Dementia, Says Study

July 2, 2014, 6:12 am

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From crankiness to lack of energy, we all know the consequences of a poor night's sleep. But what happens when sleep problems become more commonplace and we find ourselves wide awake most nights?

According to a recent study, poor sleep in old age can make our brains age faster - potentially leading to health issues such as dementia and Alzheimer's Disease.

The study, run by Duke-NUS Graduate Medical School Singapore (Duke-NUS), examined the data of 66 older Chinese adults, from the Singapore-Longitudinal Ageing Brain Study.

SEE ALSO:

Expert Tips On How To Maximise Your Sleep Tonight

Anxious? Shy? In Love? Here's Your Sleeping Position Says About You

Participants underwent structural MRI brain scans measuring brain volume and neuropsychological assessments testing cognitive function every two years. Additionally, their sleep duration was recorded through a questionnaire. Those who slept fewer hours showed evidence of faster ventricle enlargement and decline in cognitive performance.

"Our findings relate short sleep to a marker of brain ageing," said Dr June Lo, the lead author and a Duke-NUS Research Fellow.

"Work done elsewhere suggests that seven hours a day for adults seems to be the sweet spot for optimal performance on computer based cognitive tests. In coming years we hope to determine what's good for cardio-metabolic and long term brain health too," added Professor Michael Chee, senior author and Director of the Centre for Cognitive Neuroscience at Duke-NUS.

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These findings, relevant in the context of Singapore's rapidly ageing society, pave the way for future work on sleep loss and its contribution to cognitive decline, including dementia.

Past research has examined the impact of sleep duration on cognitive functions in older adults. Though faster brain ventricle enlargement is a marker for cognitive decline and the development of neurodegenerative diseases such as Alzheimer's, the effects of sleep on this marker have never been measured.

“Sleep is the single most important health behaviour we have," says Professor Russell Foster, chair of Circadian Neuroscience and head of the Sleep and Circadian Neuroscience Institute at the University of Oxford.

"It affects everything from our day-to-day functioning to our long-term physical and mental health."

Man Is Told He's Dumped In The Most Spectacular Fashion

July 2, 2014, 6:34 am

≫ Next: Barbie-Obsessed Mum-Of-Six, Lacey Wildd, Has 36 Cosmetic Surgery Procedures To Look Like Doll

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Steve Frazer, you've been nabbed.

Allegedly, he's been dating two women who found out about each other. They blew up a massive banner and hung it over the A1 - it has now been removed - and was seen by thousands of motorists commuting into Newcastle and Gateshead.

Not a great day for Steve Frazer. #dumped http://t.co/b9e15PYuoX pic.twitter.com/RvYxWM7gjS

— Sophie Barley (@SophieBarley) July 2, 2014

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(H/T: The Chronicle)

Barbie-Obsessed Mum-Of-Six, Lacey Wildd, Has 36 Cosmetic Surgery Procedures To Look Like Doll

July 2, 2014, 6:40 am

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A lot of kids love Barbie but it seems, unlike most, this woman didn't grow out of her doll phase.

Lacey Wildd, from Miami, Florida, has just undergone her 36th cosmetic surgery procedure in a bid to look like her favourite doll.



"I want to be an adult Barbie, like the extreme Barbie," the 46-year-old mother of six on TLC's My Strange Addiction.

"I'm known as one of the most extreme plastic surgery patients in the world and I want to keep pushing the limits," she added.

According to reports, Lacey's procedures have cost over a quarter of a million pounds.



The procedures Lacey - whose real name is Paula Simonds - has undergone include liposuction and having operations to make her nose look thinner and her eyes appear wider.

Thanks to her 12 breast augmentation surgeries, each of her breasts weighs 21 pounds - meaning that she has to place pillows underneath her chest while driving.

Lacey has a legion of online followers, some of whom are so loyal they even helped pay for some of her surgery.



According to Sun Sentinel, Lacey's daughter Tori Glynn, 18, appeared with her on MTV's True Life and said: "She is kind of like too much, and she's not taking into consideration that this is your project, this is your thing and not all of ours.

"I think she isn't really thinking about our opinions. What if she dies? Is she taking that into consideration?

"Does she really care that her kids could be left alone?"

We wonder what self-proclaimed 'human Barbie' Valeria Lukyanova makes of her competition.

SEE ALSO:

Barbie Designer Defends Doll's Strange Proportions, Dismisses Body Image Concerns

Meet 'Britain's Vainest Man' Who Spends £100,000 On Sunbeds, Manicures, Waxing And Facials

The 6 Things In Your Household That Are Riddled With Germs

July 2, 2014, 7:28 am

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Warning: you can't un-learn this.

Your toothbrush, which has been sitting in its pot all innocent-like, not offending anyone, may have more in common with your bog brush than you think. According to this video of germ-laden things in our household, when you flush your toilet, the water spray is airborne long enough to settle on the bristle of your toothbrush.

Gagging? That's not all.

While we already knew our keyboards and mobile phones were faecal hotspots, your reusable grocery bags may be a breeding ground for E.coli which isn't to be underestimated.

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Rich Kids Of Snapchat: Teens Share Pictures Of Rolex Watches, iPads And Private Jets

July 2, 2014, 7:59 am

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First we obsessively scrolled through pictures on Rich Kids of Instagram - now there's a new way for wealthy teens to make us jealous.

Introducing 'Rich Kids of Snapchat' - the Facebook page offering an insight into how the other half live.

Launched by a 17-year-old from the UK, the Rich Kids of Snapchat page includes pictures of Rolex watches, sports cars, iPads and private jets - all owned by people in their teens or twenties.



For those who aren't aware, Snapchat is a photo-messaging app which allows users to send pictures to friends for up to 10 seconds - unless the other user decides to take a screen shot of your pic, then there's no telling how long they might keep it for.

According to the MailOnline, the Rich Kids of Snapchat founder invites other rich youngsters to add his Snapchat handle 'RichKidSnaps' on the app.

He then sends others pictures from his own lavish lifestyle and receives snaps from the equally rich before posting the best snaps ones to the Facebook page and Instagram account.

The teen previously set up the 'What Happens at Private School Goes on Snapchat' Facebook page before creating 'Rich Kids of Snapchat' yesterday as part of his plan to expand - the groups have gained over 250,000 'likes' between them.

We can see why. Although you may find your jaw clenching while muttering the word 'twats' under your breath, scrolling through these pics is seriously addictive....