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Am I the Only Blogger Who Doesn't Want to Make It Big and Blog Full-Time?

June 5, 2015, 7:57 am
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A simple search for tips on making it big in the blogging world brings up reams and reams of advice, from SEO experts praising the value of SERPs and domain authority, to bloggers who made it big doling out tips on how others can follow in their footsteps. (Well. The tips they want to share, that is. The best ones they reserve for themselves, of course.)

Yes, everyone who has a blog has dreamt about making it big. They've daydreamed about seeing their page views hit the millions, and their social channels full of sycophantic followers clinging onto every word, praising every post, and buying whatever it was they wore that day.

But for me, nothing sounds worse than being a full-time blogger. And I feel like, sometimes, I'm the only one who's happy to be where I am with my blog.

Here are my six reasons for sticking with blogging as a hobby and no more.

1. When you become a full-time blogger, it stops being a hobby




When you rely on your blog making you an income, paying your bills and offsetting your rent (or mortgage if you're lucky enough to be on the ladder) then you can't write about that one time your colleagues judged you for having a snack drawer full of sweets, or when you were convinced an elderly lady at the bus stop was going to murder you.

You need to plan, thinking about strategy and targets, and advertisers and exclusivity and conflicts of interest. You need to attend events to be seen as an expert top blogger who's so hot right now, and then spend hours writing posts about canapés and champagne.

It becomes your job, and like some jobs, it'll suck after a while.

2. There's nothing worse than being a freelancer sometimes




The freelance life isn't for me. It's too unreliable. If you know you can charge £15,000 for an Instagram photo of course that changes somewhat, but that middle ground between being a normal blogger and transitioning to an uber-blogger means finding leads, pitching your wares, chasing invoices and going months without being paid sometimes.

Trust me. As a freelance journalist when the cat has £500 of vet bills coming up, I understand how useful extra income can be. But to rely on others to hopefully pay you on time, or you're eating beans on toast for a month? Nope.

3. I like having time away from the online world I've created and blogging full-time means that can't happen




I once got the the stage where I'd take my camera with me in case something happened which mean I could capture the moment and then write 700 words on it. Life feels weird when all you do is wait like that. Or you forego a greasy Maccies in place of that really trendy new indie cafe which serves coffee beans pooed from the very anus of a wildcat in Peru.

Sometimes, it's nice going to a restaurant and not writing about the menu, or tweeting about it, or taking oh-so-many Instagram photos. It's nice going back to enjoying life without the expectation of blogging about it and sharing it with the world.

4. Sometimes, I just don't feel like writing, and that's ok.




Sometimes, I cannot be bothered with my blog. I look at my calendar and I'm just so unenthused by it all I shut down my laptop and don't open it for a week. I don't care what events are happening or who wants to work with me, I just need a break.

Full-time blogging means you're trapped. Like a relationship, sometimes it'll be bad, sometimes it'll be good. The thing is, when you rely on your blog to provide you with heating for the next month, you need to power through that and just crack on.

5. My motivation isn't about getting money or being popular




I had a conversation with a colleague the other day about me feeling a bit disillusioned about work. I didn't like the situation I was in, and I was thinking of leaving. He admitted he'll stick out in a job he wasn't particularly thrilled with because he's extremely money-oriented. So much so, he'll be able to get on the property ladder in central London next year.

I don't understand it.

I'd be so happy if money was no more than the paper (or cotton or whatever it's made of) it was printed on. So I don't have that motivation that seems to drive some people. I couldn't care less about designer clothes or being seen at the most trendy nightspots with a bottle of Cristal and 'Isn't that Prince Harry in the corner?' whispers.

Because I don't care about amassing oodles of wealth, or being super popular, I don't have the drive some full-time bloggers have. I blog about London and life because, well, I enjoy it.

6. I'm not willing to sacrifice what I'd need to sacrifice to be a full-time blogger




I've touched on it already, but bloggers sacrifice a lot to run their sites. From hours spent taking photos and editing them into oblivion so they're as sharp and crisp and white as a Scandi-style magazine, to creating copy and promoting it over Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, Periscope, Jelly, Vine, YouTube and no doubt the 50 other social sharing sites yet to come.

It take HOURS to set a good blogging foundation and nurture it so it grows. That just rolled out of bed blogger post has actually take three hours of hair, make up and expert posing with props to get right. And then an hour editing. And an hour writing. And another hour promoting.

I couldn't imagine spending that much time on what, to me is, a hobby at the expense of family and friends. For those who do, I admire them. But I'm not willing to try it.

For any full-time bloggers reading this, good on you. Seriously, well done. I don't have what it takes, or care to try to have what it takes, to ever be in your shoes, but I appreciate the effort and sacrifice you've made.

If you're a blogger who dreams of hitting the big time and feels a bit depressed about not getting there, instead of striving to get to the top, enjoy it as it is now. Who knows, the generation after next might be fascinated with your seemingly ordinary life.

Who says you won't make it big in 2115?
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Child Car Seat Confusion: Our Guide To The New Regulations And Products

June 5, 2015, 7:59 am
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Child car seat confusion - our guide to the new regulations and products





Working out which type of child car seat will keep your brood safest on the road is more bewildering than ever, thanks to a raft of product innovations and some new regulations. If you don't know your impact shield from your top tether, or what i-Size is all about, let us help cut through the confusion.





So what's the law now and what's changing?



The law requires all children to travel in an appropriate child restraint until they reach 135cm tall or their 12th birthday – whichever comes first. It's the driver's responsibility to ensure this is the case (so if you give someone else's offspring a lift in your car and there's no child seat, you can't blame their parents!) There are very few exceptions to when a car seat needs to be used. You can find out more information on UK car seat laws here.



It's important to be aware of the definition of 'appropriate' child restraint - this has so far meant the correct group for a child's weight (although this is changing - see below). At the time of writing, this was as follows:





Car Seat Groups:

Faces: Group 0+ Rear

Weight range: Birth to 13kg

Approx. age guide*: birth to approx. 15 months



Faces: Group 1 Usually forward (can be rear)

Weight range: 9kg to 18kg

Approx. age guide*: 9 months to approx. 4 years



Faces: Group 2/3 Forward

Weight range: 15kg to 36kg

Approx. age guide*: 3 years to 12 years





*Experts have largely advised that when you should move your child up to the next stage depends more on weight than age.





So what's changing?



Under the existing laws, parents could switch their baby from their rear-facing Group 0/0+ seat into a forward-facing one when they reached 9kg - (around nine months old).



When the new regulations, called i-Size come fully into force, parents will have to keep their baby in a rear-facing seat until they are 15 months. The move will be based on a baby's length/child's height not weight.



Note there will be no change to the overall law about child seats being compulsory to the age of 12 or 135cm tall.





When is this happening?



Without wanting to sound confusing: both soon and not that soon! The i-Size rules will be phased in over five years, running in parallel with the old regulations for some time, so if you've got, say, a 12-month-old baby now and have already moved them to a forward facing seat, don't panic! They will only apply to ISOFIX seats sold and belted ones will not be covered by the new rules.



i-Size seats will start to hit the shops though in the coming months and it might well be worth choosing one if you're purchasing the next stage seat and do have ISOFIX (all i-Size seats use ISOFIX), as it will have been more rigorously tested (see below).



In the meantime, if you're off shopping for a new car seat before then, or don't have ISOFIX fixings in your vehicle, you should still look for a seat approved under the old regulation (ECER44/04) - this should be mentioned in the marketing and labelling.



Why is this i-Size regulation happening?



Largely because too many parents are switching to forward facing too soon and many are left confused by the existing guidelines on moving to the next type of seat based on weight. It's also about encouraging the use of ISOFIX seats which are easier to fit correctly and safely than those secured with the car seatbelt.





So why should babies be kept rear-facing for longer?



Most parents are keen to move their child into a forward-facing car seat as soon as possible, many switching when their baby reaches the minimum weight for a Group 1 seat (i.e. 9kg), rather than when he or she has actually outgrown the rear-facing one and are close to or have passed its maximum weight (13kg).



Understandably, parents think their baby will be happier facing forward and getting a better view of the world. Usually this is indeed true but those happy front-facing babies don't understand that they're much safer facing rearwards in the event of a collision.



The most dangerous collisions tend to be front on and a child in a forward facing seat will be flung more forcefully forwards. Additionally the load will be concentrated on the harness or impact shield (see below) area, whereas in a rearfacing seat the load of deceleration is spread across the shell of the car seat, so it's less concentrated. Their head movement will be much less, so the risk of serious injury to their head and neck will be much reduced (this is a particular issue for babies as their heads are larger relative to their bodies than those of older children and adults).



So much research evidence has built up on this from crash testing that the EU is introducing this new regulation to keep babies rearfacing until 15 months.



LIKE PARENTDISH ON FACEBOOK FOR MORE NEWS AND VIEWS FOR PARENTS



 



Until rearfacing becomes compulsory to 15 months for all types of seats, when should you change to forward-facing?



We recommend you keep your baby rear-facing as long as possible.



Here are some guidelines on switching:



* Don't do it just because your baby's feet are pushed against the car's back seat.



* Wait until he/ she has been sitting up for a minimum of three months, as this indicates he or she is better able physically to deal with the extra stresses of a collision in a front-facing seat.



* Wait until your baby is closer to, or ideally at, the maximum weight (13kg) for her rear-facing seat than the minimum weight (9kg) for the front facing seat.



* BUT do move her if her head is protruding over the top of the Group 0/0+ seat. If she outgrows the seat in height but has not reached the minimum weight for a group 1 seat, your only option will be to invest in a you'll have no choice but to get a combination group 0/1 seat. Not an ideal scenario but the only safe one.



* All other things being equal, children are undoubtedly safer rear facing for longer, so don't see switching forward as a milestone and consider safety.





What about those 'extended rear facing Group 1 seats'?



In Scandinavia, children remain in rear facing seats even beyond 15 months, all the way to age four or five. Deaths and serious injuries of child car passengers in the relevant age group there are notably lower than in the UK. You can now buy Group 1 rear-facing car seats in the UK from several of the leading manufacturers but are they always safer than forward-facing equivalents?



Victoria Pearson, car seat expert at Which, the consumer organisation which carries out car seat safety testing, says: "As with most things car seats-related it is not cut and dried - not all rear-facing car seats are equally good - and not all cars are suitable for extended rear-facing seats. In general rear-facing is a great idea, but the protection achieved will depend on how well the seat is installed."



Which's testing has found that many rear facing Group 1 seats are especially difficult to install and if installation is done incorrectly, this will reduce safety. If you do want to buy a rear-facing Group 1 seat, it's especially important to check compatibility with your vehicle and ideally get the seat professionally fitted by staff from the retailer.

Our best buy rear facing Group 1 seat: Recaro Polaric (£230)





OK so I'm ready to buy a Group 1 seat and want a forward facing one - what are my options? Are the newer style impact shield seats better than those with harnesses?



Whereas traditionally Group 1 seats have used a harness to keep their little occupant safely in place, a few companies, notably Kiddy and Cybex, now use a specially designed shield that sits across the child's lap. This is often called an impact shield. Some of these seats spread the load of a collision better than those with a harness and can reduce strain on a child's head and neck.



Another upside of this style of seat is that once your child reaches the Group 2/3 stage (at around age four), you won't need to buy another – simply remove the impact shield and you have a highback booster seat which you use with the adult seat belt. That said, they are quite expensive to start with, so this won't save you much money overall compared to buying two separate seats.



Note though that not all toddlers like having the shield across them – it can feel quite constraining it seems, although others find it handy for putting their toys on! It's worth sitting your child in this sort of seat at a retailer or in a friend's if you know someone who has one, before buying to see how they react to it, otherwise you risk an expensive mistake and a lot of tears every time you put them in the car.



Our best buy impact shield seats: Cybex Pallas 2-Fix (£270) and Kiddy PhoenixFix Pro (RRP £200)





And what about ISOFIX - I've seen seats with three instead of two fixing points?

ISOFIX, if you aren't already familiar with it, is a system that allows car seats to be 'plugged' into sockets on a car's chassis, creating a more rigid attachment than with a seat held in place by the seat belt. The system also helps reduce installation errors which can compromise a seat's protection - one study quoted by car seat brand Maxi-Cosi showed as many as half of child seats attached with a seat belt were fitted incorrectly in some way, with 27% having an error that would a have significant impact on safety. ISOFIX makes correct fitting much easier - you just click the seat into the sockets, with no faffing about routing the seat belt webbing around the seat.



Cars made since 2006 have mostly had two ISOFIX fixing points which the bottom of the car seat (or any associated base) plugs into.



Newer cars must now also have a third fixing point which attaches to the top of the child seat too, preventing it from tipping forward if there's a collision - this is called a top tether and is sometimes referred to as an ISOFIX+ system. To use the car's top tether though, you need a compatible top tether car seat - there aren't yet lots of these about and they aren't cheap.



If you do want this feature, check whether your car has the third point – look in the manual's section on child seats or check behind the rear seat back. Bear in mind if you buy one of these seats and it will be used in an older second or grandparents' car, you'll need to ensure it can also be fitted without the top tether, either with standard two point ISOFIX fixings or with the adult seat belt, depending on what's available in the vehicle concerned.

Our best buy three point ISOFIX seat: Britax Trifix (£285).



Liat Hughes Joshi is author of What to Buy for Your Baby, which includes buying guides for all stages of child car seat, and New Old-fashioned Parenting. Follow Liat on Twitter: @liathughesjoshi



The information in this feature was correct at the time of writing (March 2014).
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Disrupting the Age Game

June 5, 2015, 8:01 am
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Three years ago I started the Evermore journey, determined to provide positive lifestyle choices for people in later life. Key to this has been changing the conversation around ageing as for too long it had focussed on either decrepitude or the cost of care.

In 2013 we created a manifesto that set out a positive message to our customers and the rest of the world. We said:

We're starting a revolution.
Where growing older is about having choices, doing what you love, and feeling good.
Where you're not defined by age or illness.
And compromising your lifestyle because of current market failure is unacceptable.
Where you can still enjoy freedom and express your individuality, just as you have always done.


It sounds simple but at the time it felt like we were one of the few voices that could be heard talking about revolution in ageing. Alongside our good friend, Dr Bill Thomas, we said older age does and could mean more, and that institutional models of care do not encourage or help people to enjoy a full and meaningful life.

In the States Dr Bill has taken his message on tour, first via Second Wind and most recently the Age of Disruption. We're bringing Dr Bill and the Age of Disruption tour to Lancaster, Manchester and Leeds this June to help keep the conversation rolling and stimulate debate. You can learn more about the tour and how to get involved here.

What is the Age of Disruption? It's about challenging the current views of ageing. It's not a slippery slope of misery and decline but an opportunity to stay happy if you embrace the risks and rewards of growing older.

This alternative view of older age is slowly being taken to heart by the wider community as well as the health and social care sector. Just this week I took part in an event in Edinburgh to discuss how long term care can be transformed from an "end of life institutional model to a dynamic market full of radical and disruptive new product and service concepts".

The Age of Disruption is building momentum and we're putting plans in place to spread the revolution by taking the Evermore philosophy and approach to the world.

It's not enough to create places where older people can live happier for longer, we want to create a movement of like-minded people who are motivated to make a difference and take a stand against ageist stereotypes every day.

Starting with the care sector, we'll help frontline staff feel empowered to make decisions that positively impact on the very people they support. They'll become 'feel good activists' who will take time to develop relationships and connections, helping them to understand the individual needs and desires of older people rather than defining them by their date of birth or illness.

If we can encourage care workers to rethink ageing and give them the freedom to meet the needs of this savvy and demanding older consumer, we'll start to see greater innovation and new ways to encouraging older people to remain active participants in their community. This will benefit everyone.

Are you ready for the Age of Disruption?
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Rewriting Your Life

June 5, 2015, 8:02 am
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I had an experience during one self-hypnosis/relaxation session that I felt should be shared. It is a mental technique for the subconscious mind that is intended to be at its most effective in deep trance, but yet again, it offered an insight, that undeniable light-bulb moment in the midst of my deep relaxation, that put another piece of life's great jigsaw puzzle in its place.

You sit down in a comfy chair, pen and notebook in hand. You write. Write down all the experiences you want to erase the negative memories from. For example, some of mine would be panic attacks. Breakdowns. Being ignored in school while struggling so painfully inside. Doctors writing me off as an attention seeker. Whatever your experiences, write until you have no words left to inscribe on those sheets of paper.

Then cut it all up. This is important. Use scissors to get a precise cut as it will make the later task easier by far!

Slice up very last page. Every last word. Cut randomly so you have a bunch of letters here, a single letter there, a full word every so often. Cut it into tiny pieces until all you have left is a confetti of jumbled letters and words.

Place the pile of words and letters into a box and close the lid.

You might be thinking the next step would be to throw it away, to take it to someplace in the mind where it will not be easily uncovered again. But wait...if we throw it away, or bury it, are we really gaining any insights and self-reflection? If we get rid of it, are we maybe, just maybe, running away from our life experiences and the lessons they can possibly teach us?

To write is, in itself, an outlet. To write, without thinking, about negative past experiences we would really rather forget, and then to either burn, shred or tear it up, is immensely therapeutic and recommended by many therapists. But if we got rid of all the pieces of all that pain, we wouldn't be able to do this:

We wouldn't be able to go and sit back down in that chair and open that beautiful box. We wouldn't be able to pick out a random handful of letters and words in order to make new words and sentences. To rewrite the story, the experience, using the exact same words.

And within every single experience you have scribed and cut, no matter how short or long, no matter how life-altering and devastating the experience, you will find letters that spell out the very things that were there in that experience in the first place without you ever knowing.

Love. Future. Self-worth. Value. Trust.

Hope.

2015-06-05-1433497995-2321749-SunCloud1.JPG

They were always there, within that awful experience you went through. It just took cutting it up into pieces to be able to see it. Perhaps the value in this technique is that it allows you to reassess what you saw as a hopeless, bleak, horrid time; to see that even though you went through all that and thought you knew every single thing about that experience, there were in fact things there all along that you couldn't see and desperately wanted to find. They never went away; they were just hidden.

Now you know they were always within you. How does that make you feel about all those things you wrote about?

Read more from Laura at http://believementalhealth.wordpress.com
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RuPaul's Drag Race Star Appears In Magnum's 'Be True To Yourself' Ad Celebrating Gender Diversity

June 5, 2015, 8:07 am
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RuPaul's Drag Race star, Willam Belli, looks sassier than ever in Magnum's latest advert celebrating people from all walks of life.

The series of ads celebrate gender diversity in all its forms, including those who don't conform to one particular gender.

magnum advert

With the help of Caitlyn Jenner, gender identity is probably more topical than it's ever been.

"Magnum believes that everyone should indulge in their personal pleasure," says the brand's YouTube channel.

"It doesn’t matter who you are, or what you take pleasure in; Magnum wish to inspire all Pleasure Seekers to seize it."

The 'Be True To Your Pleasure Film' launched earlier this year at the Cannes Film Festival.

According to the brand, the film celebrates "spontaneity and the joy of letting go".

"It means turning off that little voice inside our head that compels us to live up to social expectations and say no to pleasure.

"It’s about saying yes."

We're saying yes to gender diversity. And yes to ice cream, too.

SEE ALSO:

Trans People Answer All Those Questions You Felt Too Awkward To Ask

Transgender Children Appear As Their Authentic Selves In Stunning Photo Project




[H/T Metro]
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World's First Workout-Friendly Hijab Raises Over £8,500 On Kickstarter

June 5, 2015, 8:35 am
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A Kickstarter project for the world's first climate adapting hijab has raised £8,500 in just three days, smashing the original £3,270 target.

Three hundred and fifteen people put their money behind Veil, the company creating the all-weather friendly hijab, Cool Dry.

The brand's founder, 22-year-old Ahmad Ghanem told HuffPost: "Seeing all these apparel companies like Nike using technology in their clothing made me think, why hasn't this been incorporated into the hijab? These women need it more than any athlete, in my opinion. They wear it all year round, no matter what the weather. It's amazing."


hijab

"I've been working long and hard for the last two years on this and it's amazing to finally see it come to life. Being 22 and having my first business is definitely an experience," he added.

Ghanem, from Ohio, spent 18 months researching the best fabrics and manufacturers before taking the project to Kickstarter to put his plans into motion.

The Cool Dry nylon hijab is made from smart nylon fabric is water repellent, reflects up to 80% of heat rays and also wicks sweat away, making it the first workout-friendly hijab.

"I really want to inspire and push more women who wear the headscarf to follow their dreams and accomplish their goals. It's something a lot of people believe is oppressive, but many of them truly love what they wear. I want Veil to be an extra sense of comfort and positivity for them, not just another business," Ghanem said.
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Women's World Cup 2015: Get To Know The Players On The England Team

June 5, 2015, 8:35 am
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UK Women In Work Have Fuelled Britain's Employment Rate Finally Overtaking The US

June 5, 2015, 9:03 am
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Britain's employment rate is trumping that of the US for the first time in years, and it's all thanks to getting more women into work after they have children.

While Britain used to look to the US as a model for a society where many people are employed, the tables have turned with the UK an inspiration for US businesses, after a long-term shift in the number of women in work, especially single mothers.

A new study by the Resolution Foundation has found the proportion of British families where no-one works are at their lowest for 30 years - an employment rate that beats America's and means the UK is leading our cousins across the pond.

cameron obama
Sorry Obama, we have a higher employment rate than you


This is partially thanks to a combination of more child-friendly workplaces, tax credits and schemes to get lone parents - mainly women - into employment, which have taken a "generation of toil" to achieve, according to the foundation's chief executive.

Blogging on The Huffington Post UK, Gavin Kelly, the Chief executive of the Resolution Foundation, says: "America is still the country that most captures the imagination of the typical UK policy-maker, whether they are on the centre-right or centre-left. And for many in British politics, the US labour market would still be a place we should be learning lessons from. The standard view would probably be that the hyper-flexible, lean-welfare, go-getting US offers a guide to what a high-employment (if high-poverty) model looks like."

But this idea is "past its sell-by date", he explains.

The US employment rate has been falling since the millennium, the report finds, but the UK's employment rate is in "rude health" despite Britain experiencing a deeper recession than the US from 2008.

If the US had the same employment rate as Britain, there would be 10 million more people in jobs in the US than there are currently, the report says.

The "gentle rise" of female employment throughout the last century can be thanked for the transformation in Britain, Kelly argues. The boost in women having jobs, and how much the earned, was “one of the main factors that prevented low and middle income families experiencing a decline in their living standards" before the recession, Kelly claims.

SEE ALSO:


Government policies in areas like maternity leave and flexible working have taken a "generation of toil" to achieve, Kelly says, and we're still behind top European countries on these. Older people in the UK are also working more than ever before, partly due to plummeting pensions incomes.

Paul Waugh, The Huffington Post UK's Executive Editor for Politics, writes: "The idea that the US is a booming jobs-filled economy while we are a welfare-dependent backsliders has been turned on its head. For all Bill Clinton’s warm words on the issue, American single mothers’ unemployment rates have gone up, not down."

Gavin Kelly warns that tax credits have also been crucial to our rising employment, and says that cutting them could undermine the good work that has been done since the 1990s.

Paul Waugh points out both Labour and the Conservatives are likely to seize on the report, with Labour already saying it would oppose any “harsh brutal and brutalising” welfare reforms, and the Tories likely to lean on the research as proof they have got people off welfare into work.

"Indeed many Republicans in the US are looking closely at how the UK has pulled off its transformation," Waugh concludes. "Paul Ryan has told [Iain Duncan Smith] that ‘you’re ten years ahead of us, but that’s where we should be heading’."

In contrast, the UK should try to learn lessons from the US on how not to approach jobs, Kelly writes in his blog. Rising wages are essential to keep people in work, he said, and a generation of pay stagnation in the US has aligned with falling unemployment.

It's also important to look at the areas of employment policy where the UK has been less impressive. Employment rates for households including the disabled have been static since the 1990s, the report found, and we need a "significant shift" and financial and legal changes to overhaul this, in the same way as the employment of mothers has evolved.

READ GAVIN KELLY'S FULL BLOG: The View That Britain Should Be Learning Lessons From the US Labour Market Is Long Past Its Sell-By Date



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Dan Osbourne And Jacqueline Jossa Share Snaps From Baby Ella's First Holiday... We're In Love!

June 5, 2015, 9:04 am
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Jacqueline Jossa only gave birth to baby Ella four months ago, but she's already enjoying her first family holiday with boyfriend, Dan Osbourne.

The Eastenders actress shared photos on Instagram of Ella having her toes dipped in water and enjoying a bit of sun - and the pictures have completely made our day.

Osbourne, 23, who is also father to 14-month-old Teddy with ex-girlfriend Megan Tomlin, posted a photo on Instagram of Jossa and Ella in a moment of fatherly pride.

"My absolutely beautiful girls," he wrote. <3

My absolutely beautiful girls!! ❤️

A photo posted by Dan Osborne (@danosborneofficial) on




Jossa also shared an Instagram snap in which Osbourne is pictured holding Ella as her toes are dipped into the sea - on what may be her very first time on a beach.

The four-month-old looks unsure what's going on, but Osbourne has a large grin on his face. Cute.

☀️

A photo posted by Jacqueline Jossa (@jacjossa) on




It looks like the new family are having the best time together somewhere very hot and sunny with the palm trees and sun beds in the background... and we're a little bit jealous.

Osbourne seems smitten with his newborn and girlfriend, posting cute couple photos and bonding time with Ella, too. He is definitely one happy dad right now!

Holidayyy ❤️

A photo posted by Dan Osborne (@danosborneofficial) on




Ella on daddy's shoulders

A photo posted by Dan Osborne (@danosborneofficial) on




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Planning a Wedding - The Groom's Perspective!

June 5, 2015, 9:13 am
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2015-06-04-1433421994-9092126-18406105422_8c7fbf4710_o.jpg

photo credit: Cristina + Stefano via photopin (license)



Last September I asked the love of my life to be my wife. She said yes, and so began a year long exponential learning curve.

Let me get one thing out of the way first. I can't wait to be married, I can't wait to be a husband, to have wife and to spend my life with the one I love...but getting married is a bloody nightmare!

Everyone tells me that once the day comes it'll be amazing and all the stress (and money spent) will be worth it but we're now eight weeks before the wedding and the list of things we've yet to organise is still huge (and growing).

We decided that we didn't want the standard hotel wedding where you pay for a package and it's all organised for you, we thought "Yeah, we're creative types, we could totally design and organise our wedding from scratch"...oh how I look back on the young, naive, newly engaged fools we were with pity.

The first thing you learn when you are planning a wedding is that everything costs double what you thought it would cost. The average UK wedding, not including honeymoon and rings, currently costs £21,000...I'll let you mull that over for a second... That's including the millionaires that have unlimited funds and the elopers who tie the knot for next to nothing. Here are some things you could buy for £21,000.

1. A brand new BMW 1 series sports hatch
2. A 10% deposit on the average UK house
3. 75 Playstation 4's
4. A three year degree (average UK tuition fees)
5. A top of the range BMW K1600 Motorbike (this one hurts the most)

I could go on but it would make too depressed to do so.

When you mention the word "wedding" to suppliers, their eyes widen, they rub their palms together and I can hear a till in the background going "Kerching!". It's just the way it works unfortunately, while couples are willing to pay a premium to make their day perfect, suppliers will continue to charge what they know people will pay.

And it's not all about the money. We decided to "dry hire" a venue, which means you hire the empty shell of the venue and supply everything yourself. That means caterers, band, bar staff, alcohol, soft drinks, cutlery, crockery, table linen, decorations, flowers, candles, dance floor, P.A system...even as i'm writing this blog I'm thinking of more things to add...the list goes on.

Planning a wedding should not be undertaken lightly. Most of us will never have planned anything so complex in our lives, and I have huge respect for event planners and wedding planners who do it every day. I had no idea how hard it would be.

However, there is good news. I have come out of this process with a nugget of advice, a tiny piece of knowledge that we discovered the hard way and I'm passing it on to you...gratis.

THIS IS YOUR WEDDING DAY!

Don't do anything just because you think it is expected of you, don't do anything for the sake of someone else, don't invite anyone just because you feel like you should. Lots of people will offer help and advice which is greatly appreciated, but ultimately it's up to the two of you to get everything sorted, You are the only people who can make final decisions. Your wedding day should be about you as a couple and it should reflect your personalities. It's so easy to get carried away with how your wedding should look and what you should have when you compare it to others that you've been to and to those in the wedding magazines. Every now and again, step back and remember why you're drowning in paper work and bills. It's all about sharing your day with the ones you love...nothing more, nothing less. And what better way to start married life than with a huge party?!

Good Luck and see you on the other side.
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Michelle Phan On The Kylie Jenner Challenge And Summer Beauty Trends

June 5, 2015, 9:20 am
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Being one step ahead of the pack is Michelle Phan's speciality.

She was one of the first people to start sharing beauty vlogs way back in 2007, and she taught her 7.2 million YouTube subscribers how to fake bigger lips long before the #KylieJennerChallenge took off.

“There’s a funny story about that,” Phan tells HuffPost UK Style.

michelle phan

“Last year I posted a video showing how to create larger looking lips without going under the needle," she explains.

"I showed how to take a circular cup and place it over the lips, then suck the air out to create a vacuum, and that gives the illusion of larger lips.

“It was just a fun trick I never thought anyone would actually do it, so when I saw the Kylie Jenner Challenge start to become a trend I was cracking up. It was hilarious.”

The lip swelling trend faced some criticism, but Phan thinks it is just a bit of fun and in her opinion there's another "beauty crime" which is far more worrying:

“I'm a huge believer in trying everything once, even the Kylie Jenner Challenge," she says.

"The only exception is over-plucking your eyebrows - never do that, because it takes months for them to grow back and for you to recover from that.”

Phan's career is going from strength to strength. She has just launched a new blogging network called ICON, which hosts content from dancer, model and Instagram star Danielle Peazer, beauty vlogger Kaushal Beauty and Millie Mackintosh's nutritionist Madeline Shaw, to name but a few.




Phan's impressive CV also includes her subscription service, Ipsy, her cosmetics line, beauty contracts and a beauty book: Make Up Your Life.

Not to mention achievements such as reaching more than one billion views on YouTube and earning a spot on the Forbes 30 Under 30 list.

So how did Phan get to where she is now?

"I actually became a beauty vlogger after being turned down for a job at a department store beauty counter," she admits.

"That really inspired me to open my own doors and explore my own journey. And for me, that door happened to be a laptop and that laptop led me to YouTube.

"So two months after I was turned down for the beauty counter job, I shot my first video.

"I had to learn everything on the sly and it was very awkward at first shooting my own makeup tutorial, but I wanted to try something different and that was just another creative outlet for me to explore.

"So I uploaded the video on YouTube back in 2007 and didn’t expect anyone to really watch it, but in the first week I had garnered over 40,000 views - and that was the beginning of my online career.

"At the time I was a full-time college student and I was also working as a waitress on the weekends to make ends meet.

"It wasn’t until three years later that I was finally able to make a little bit of money from my YouTube videos - and even then it was only like around 25 cents a day.

"I understood that if I could take more time to upload more content on my channel and gain more subscribers, I would in turn get more money.

"So I took a leap of faith right after the economy crashed in 2008 and told my employers I was going to quit and focus on YouTube. They all thought I was crazy, but I was certain there was a future in beauty vlogging and I wanted to be a part of it

"Having more time meant I could focus on creating more exciting content and that was the turning point of my career."

SEE ALSO:

Pixiwoo Summer Makeup: The Supervloggers Share Their Best Beauty Tips For The Season

Suki Waterhouse Uses This Fizzy Beverage To Wash Her Hair


One of the keys to Phan's success is that she has an eye for spotting beauty trends before they go viral. So where does she find inspiration?

"Inspiration is everywhere, you just have to look," she says.

"You might be surprised to know that a lot of the latest beauty trends originally come from local makeup artists, whose work I find by looking at indie magazines within the art and beauty space, as well as Instagram accounts that are dedicated to editorial shoots.

"I also keep an eye on what’s happening in Asia too. A lot of the trends out here in the States originated in Asia, for instance BB cream and now the cushion compact.

"So I look at what the rock stars and pop stars are wearing out there and also the fashion and style of vloggers and that inspires lot of ideas for me.

“Also, I really find a lot of inspiration for content from my online community. I follow a lot of my followers’ Instagram and Twitter accounts, as I like to see what they’re posting and that inspires ideas for my channel."

Phan describes her personal style as being quite "simple", but her beauty idols are people who don't play it safe.

"Celebrity-wise I think Rihanna’s beauty looks are stunning," she says. "I love how she’s a chameleon and is always transforming herself.

"Another beauty idol I love is from Asia and it’s a guy.

"His name is G-Dragon and he’s a popstar.

"His style is androgynous, which is a look that's becoming very popular within the beauty world. G-Dragon wears makeup, but he does so in a very cool understated way. That’s another person who inspires me."

#BIGBANG #MADESERIESA #20150601 #MADE #BANGBANGBANG

A photo posted by G-DRAGON (@xxxibgdrgn) on




There is one area of her career that Phan is particularly proud of - and that is being part of a community that is helping to challenge narrow definitions of beauty.

"It's really exciting how the beauty space has changed and ideals of beauty have completely transformed in the last few years," she says.

"When you’re online it's a free for all. You can find beauty anywhere and everywhere.

"I definitely think the internet has changed the beauty aesthetic, there’s no longer an idea of a 'one size fits all' look.

"There's now more of an understanding that beauty can be found everywhere, in all cultures, diversities, skin colours and genders.

"That really is a big step forward for the beauty industry, because we need to start celebrating diversity and inspiring more people, especially impressionable young girls who don’t normally see some who looks similar to them on the cover of a magazine.

"But they’ll see that person on an Instagram account and if that person has hundreds of thousands of followers, then that's positive validation for them too.

"I really believe we are going to be living in a generation of more confident girls and that’s what we need.

"We need more confident girls who love themselves, and believe in themselves, and can really fulfill their potential in life because their insecurity is banished."

The Beauty Trends Michelle Phan Will Be Wearing This Summer

1. Larger lips

"Use a technique called over-drawing," Phan advises. "Take a lip liner that matches your natural lip colour and outline your lips to creating the illusion of extra fullness."

2. Highlighting

"Dewy skin is going to be very popular," says Phan. "Use highlighters and a darker bronzer to create luminous glowing skin, which looks great in selfies."

3. Blue mascara

"Apply a really nice electric blue mascara to your upper and lower lashes and they will look stunning," says Phan. "It’s beautiful and is going to be really popular during the music festival season."

ICON UK is creatively led by Michelle Phan and is Youtube’s ultimate lifestyle destination for young women

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Caitlyn Jenner's Vanity Fair Cover Photo Sparks #MyVanityFairCover Campaign Among The Transgender Community (PICS)

June 6, 2015, 2:52 am
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Caitlyn Jenner said she wanted to “make a difference in this world” when she came out as transgender back in April, and her Vanity Fair cover has now inspired others to make their own version of the already-iconic image.

SEE MORE:


Earlier this week, Caitlyn introduced herself to the world via a magazine photo-shoot with Vanity Fair, which was quickly posted all over the Internet, and lauded on social media.

However, when Tumblr users Crystal Fraiser and Jenn Dolari noticed that people were taking the opportunity to compliment Caitlyn for looking ‘traditionally beautiful’, rather than for her courage, they were pushed to create the #MyVanityFairCover campaign, urging transgender people to post their own version of the cover.

vanity fair
Caitlyn Jenner's Vanity Fair cover


Crystal writes: “I’ve felt frustrated and useless and overwhelmed by opinions on transgender women and how we’re ‘supposed’ to look if we want to be taken seriously… but not all of us adhere to those standards. Not all of us want to. Not all of us can. Some of us do, but only out of fear. Some of us do but we aren’t sure why.

“Admiration and praise for trans women shouldn’t only come if we fit a narrow definition of beauty. As a good friend of mine said Monday, ‘Where’s my Vanity Fair cover?’”

Here are just a handful of the results:













http://androgynousadventures.tumblr.com/post/120778173988/just-me-andie-old-pic-but-i-like-it-oh-yeah








http://letterboxedition.tumblr.com/post/120803182376/here-it-is-myvanityfaircover





http://zimbaskray.tumblr.com/post/120783418849





http://qbnaith.tumblr.com/post/120782418639


It was revealed earlier this week that Caitlyn would be bestowed with the Courage Award at this year’s ESPY Awards, honouring sports players whose bravery “transcends the world of sport”.

A teaser trailer for her forthcoming E! documentary, ‘I Am Cait’, has also been unveiled, ahead of its TV next next month.

LIKE US ON FACEBOOK | FOLLOW US ON TWITTER




Useful websites and helplines:
  • Beaumont Society is a national self help body run by and for the transgender community | 01582 412220

  • The Gender Trust supports anyone affected by gender identity | 01527 894 838

  • Mermaids offers information, support, friendship and shared experiences for young people with gender identity issues | 0208 1234819

  • LGBT Youth Scotland is the largest youth and community-based organisation for LGBT people in Scotland. Text 07786 202 370

  • Gires provides information for trans people, their families and professionals who care for them | 01372 801554

  • Depend provides support, advice and information for anyone who knows, or is related to, a transsexual person in the UK.

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Three Lessons From 15 Operations: Part One

June 9, 2015, 3:25 am
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As I mentioned in my last post, I have had a series of medical surgeries over the last two decades. I won't go into the details as that could be a whole blog post of its own; in fact, it is soon to have a book of its own. Instead, in this article, I am going to discuss what my experiences have taught me because I believe it has made me into the person I am to a large extent. To say I only learnt three lessons would greatly diminish the impact that these surgeries have had on my life but I have decided to summarise my learnings into three separate posts, so as not to bore my seemingly small, albeit growing, audience. Lesson 1: Be grateful for the little things - Cliché, I know but bear with me.

When you get hospitalised for a prolonged period of time you start to notice all the small things that you always took for granted. In my most recent visit to the hospital, the three things I missed most were food, running and privacy (in that order). Food - for six weeks, I was not allowed to eat. When I tell people this, they think I am exaggerating and I wish I was. I was being fed by an IV drip with nutrients and minerals and wasn't allowed more than a sip of water every couple of hours. This leads to some drastic consequences. After three weeks I began begging for any morsel of food, literally. Embarrassingly I will admit, I even bartered with the nurses to try to get a singular grain of rice. For those that know me personally on this blog, will know that this led to a series of Asian-related jokes. By the fourth week, I was searching #food up on Instagram and more specifically #chocolate and just staring at pictures of food. By the final week, I had just started walking and had been prescribed to do laps of the hospital floor. Unfortunately on one of these days, my walk coincided with lunchtime. I was walking past many trays of half-eaten food and before anyone could notice, snuck a chip off someone's plate. Turns out this no-eating rule wasn't for the nurses amusement - needless to say, the chip didn't stay down long.

Back to these walks. After abdominal surgery, you are bed bound, firstly to allow your stomach muscles to rebuild and to avoid straining your stitches but mainly because it is often too painful to cough, let alone attempt to walk. Gradually, they get you to use your muscles to sit up in bed and then eventually into a chair and then the day comes when you start to walk. On one hospitalisation, the period that I was bed-ridden was so long that I actually had to relearn how to walk - a very confusing task even though toddlers seem to do it fairly easily. This was great for the first day but considering the hospital corridor was in a circle, doing 40 laps a day ended up being mind-numbingly boring. My friends who visited me, literally took me on walks everyday - yes, like a dog. I have never been an active type, but this experience made me just want to run. With an IV drip, and many nurses keeping a close eye on me, this was not a possibility however.

Privacy - It comes a point during every hospitalisation where everyone on the floor has seen you naked, either because they walked in on you during your sponge bathe or because you forgot to do one of the strings of your robe up. At first, it becomes an issue with your dignity but then you just don't care anymore and just embrace your nakedness in all it's magnificence and become a bit of an exhibitionist. This wasn't the only issue with privacy - with people coming in and out of your room and not being able to reach your door to lock people out, it became increasingly more difficult to get a moment of silence. In fact, one day I resorted to getting isolation under my duvet and stayed there for an entire day - childish I know, but it was bliss.

All these things that I missed when I was in hospital just meant one thing. I was so much more appreciative of the little things once I was free of the shackles of my hospital bed. I was grateful for everything from being able to go to the toilet alone to being able to run in the gym. Once you go back to your normal life, you live life to such a greater extent. Everything you do is with so much more intensity and passion. You want to see everyone and do everything. The small excuses I used to make for not doing things were gone. It's a level of gratitude that is so strong that nothing could get me down. I remember the first day I returned back to university. It was valentine's day and I had placed a ban amongst my friends. No bitterness or being sad because you are single. For whatever reason, they humoured me and my overly optimistic attitude, and we made some of the best memories I have from university. We went out on a quadruple date as friends and had a terrific night out despite the fact that upon walking into the club, I got greeted with a string of back-handed compliments which would have normally sent me into a rage, left me unaffected purely because there was so much to be thankful for, that I refused to let one idiot ruin my night when I had spent the day surrounded by love from my friends. Even seeing other people in love and giving each other roses on the street (yes, that actually happened) made me happy that day.

In conclusion, appreciate the little things in life. There are people in this world who have a lot less than you and are a lot more grateful. Take a moment to appreciate your loved ones and despite how cheesy this may all sound, you do not realise what you are missing until it gets taken away from you. I like to think that people don't have to experience what I had to, to be grateful.
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Beach Body Aftermath: Advertising Attitudes

June 9, 2015, 3:28 am
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In the past month, since the Beach Body Ready advertising debacle, I've found myself noticing similar objection to other ads all over the place.

There was the bus advert that objectors said trivialised prostitution and the scantily clad French Maid and Swedish supermodel featured on another London tube ad campaign compared to outdated sexist 1970s ads. Then there was the YSL advert that was banned by the Advertising Standards Authority for being irresponsible for featuring an underweight model.

These kinds of adverts, either highly sexualising women or featuring models who appear unhealthy or underweight or just unattainably "perfect" have, for as long as I remember, drummed their way into my mind. Reading magazines, I lost myself within pages packed with promises of perfect womanhood, taught that objectification was normal and malnourishment aspirational. Being happy didn't appear as desirable as being thin.

These images seeped their way into my mind as a child, along with the impossibly thin cartoon princesses and the airbrushed 'perfect' world of fashion and advertising. I hated myself as I grew up because I knew I didn't look like those women. I could never look like them. I lost so much weight within my eating disorder, yet I could never attain the warped ideal these pictures were selling me. It took me a long while to learn that my body, with all its perfectly imperfect flaws, was worthy of celebration and respect. I don't have to love it but I do need to accept it, enjoy it, revel in it and let go of insecurities that have held me back.

I never thought opposing this advert was only a feminist issue. Yes, I am a feminist. Yes, we have put up with sexual objectification and unhealthy imagery in advertising for far too long. Yes, women have been taught all our lives and for centuries to prioritise looks above health and we're sick to death of it (quite literally for some). But it is no longer only women affected by the blatant selling of "the body beautiful". And yet so many said those who opposed the advert were "f*cking feminists getting salt in their vaginas because they'll never look as good as [the model]." The company themselves retweeted that particularly eloquent message of support. And many more similar "feminazi" and "SJW" slurs too.

But Social Justice Warrior sounds, to me, like a good thing. Social? Good thing! Justice? Good thing! And I'd rather be a warrior who stands up for what they believe in than hiding my voice away timidly or apathetically not caring.

We are all, men and women, subjected to this marketing strategy of "You don't look like this. Look at all the fun, all the happiness, all the sex this person is getting. Buy our product to BE like them."

Something is changing, though. We, the public, are fed up of advertisers trying to bully us into buying their product. Advertising is the wallpaper of our lives, and we want it to stop sneering at us.

2015-06-08-1433799227-1989524-IMG_4760.JPG

A year ago I was researching a show about body image (on tour now). I asked around 40 interviewees, of varying ages, races, with hidden illnesses, disability, disfigurement and models, what beauty was. Their answers were varied, revealing, moving. "A sparkle in the eyes." "A balance between order and chaos." "How you treat other people" "Something that moves you from one position to another" "Difference." Wouldn't it be wonderful if advertisers focused more on these definitions of beauty, encouraging us to be kinder, encouraging us to sparkle more, celebrating our differences and use their power to move us from one position to another?

The company behind the original, now banned in the UK, advert have taken it now to New York. A huge ad now hangs in the centre of the American city, staring down at the inhabitants of that beautiful place. The Head of Global Marketing of the company said it was a "big middle finger" to all those who opposed it in London. As rude and unnecessary as that very public, very unprofessional statement is, if they're looking for an outraged reaction to bring them more publicity, they won't be getting it from me.

I will continue to stand up for what I believe in and we will continue, together to stand against this sort of disrespect in adverts and attitudes. And while I hope the people of New York are aware of the attitudes this company has towards mental health and their awful, disrespectful social media conduct, this battle is bigger, more important than one advert, one company. This is an ongoing journey and they are just a tiny yellow dot on the path behind us as we travel full speed ahead towards the horizon of progress.

This might be the end of one momentary debacle but it could be the beginning of a whole new era.

Juliette's website
London Leicester Square Theatre 17 and 18 June - tickets on sale now
Edinburgh Gilded Balloon at Edinburgh Fringe 16-21 August - tickets on sale now
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The Truth About Being "Naturally Slim" After 40

June 9, 2015, 3:36 am
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When you see someone who seems to eat a lot and is still slim, do you curse your bad luck?

Do you wish you had their genes? Or their fast metabolism?

Although genes do impact body shape and some aspects of weight, when a woman over 40 is able to "eat what they want" and still stay slim, it's most heavily influenced by behaviour.

Which is great news, because that's one thing you can copy and make your own.

But what you need to remember is that if you ask a naturally slim woman how she does it, usually all you get is nonsense about a quick metabolism and how "I got it from my mother".

In actuality, most of the time they can't tell you because the behaviours are second nature and so they don't think about them.

So instead of asking them, let me show you what they are really doing:

1. Don't surround yourself with food

One of my clients once described her desk at work as a "smorgasbord".

She was surrounded by food, and so even if she wasn't hungry, the mere sight of it, prompted her to eat what was there.

When food is in front of you, you will find it very hard to resist. So don't keep it in front of you!

Clear your environment of these types of foods. Make it so that if you want a treat, you have to go out and get it, rather than just reach over to your desk.


2. Don't waste calories on mediocre food.

Make sure that if you're eating something, that it is tasty and worthwhile.

Most people don't do this. They might be offered a biscuit and eat the whole thing even if it didn't taste very good.

If you like biscuits, only eat the best tasting ones. Don't "waste" calories on mediocre food.

3. Practice Balanced Indulgence

This is a very common behaviour of naturally slim people. If they know that they are going to have a particularly indulgent meal that night, they will eat less during the day. I call this balanced indulgence.

If you've just had an especially large lunch, don't you think you could get by with a lighter dinner?

Of course you could. But research shows that most overweight people don't think like that and eat the same amount as usual.

This is why some slim people look like they defy the laws of thermodynamics. They look like they eat a lot, but are still slim. This isn't some magic trick. It's just that they eat less at other times.


4. Share readily.

A good example of this, is sharing desserts with someone else.

Most of my clients tell me that after a while, it's hard to justify eating a whole dessert. It's too much at the end of the meal.

It's so much better to share with someone else, so you get a taste, but don't get the overwhelmed feeling of having eaten too much.

5. Eat slowly

Instead of scarfing down food as quickly as possible, take time to eat. Make meals an occasion and ensure that you enjoy and savour them as much as possible.

Contrast this with the average person who may eat some meals while standing up or driving.

6. Don't get depressed if your weight fluctuates

Even when you've been maintaining your weight all your life, you will have fluctuations. You might over-eat after a weekend away, and your weight might go up a pound or two.

When your weight does go up a little, don't beat yourself up about it. It's normal.

7. Know what to do if your weight fluctuates

If you want to maintain your weight for the long-term, you need to know what to do if your weight fluctuates upwards.

For one, you want to know what went wrong, learn from the mistake and try and prevent it happening again.

And secondly, you want to be able to bounce back as soon as possible.

Bouncing back doesn't mean going for extreme measures like crash dieting to offset the bad weekend. Instead it just means getting back to your normal routine.

You can do it too!

If you change your eating behaviour to replicate those that seem to be able to maintain their weight naturally, you can achieve what they have. These seven tips are your starting point.

For more about a behavioural approach to weight loss click here.
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Pope Francis Warns Parents About Children Having Computers In Their Bedrooms Because Of The 'Filth'

June 9, 2015, 3:54 am
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Pope Francis has said parents should not let children use computers in their bedrooms because of the dangers of "internet filth".

Speaking to journalists on the Papal Plane on his way to Rome, the Express reported the Pope said: "There is dirty content, pornography, semi-pornography.

"There are parents that are very worried and don't let their children have computers in their bedroom but in a common place."

He added that spending too much time spent on a computer could lead to a "psychological illness".

"When it takes away from communal and family life, social life, sport, art, and we remain attached to our computers, this is a psychological illness. This is certain,” he said.

pope francis plane

Speaking on the plane, Pope Francis said it was "bad for the soul" for children to be too attached to their computers.

He added: “It makes you a slave to your computer.”

The Pope did however accept that the modern world is full of technology and it is something we can't ignore. He described this reality as "the progress of mankind".

SEE ALSO:

People Are Claiming Pope Francis Just Performed A Miracle

The Rise of the iParent: Five Tips and One Rule for Kids and Technology


The Pope does have a Twitter account with more than six million followers, which he regularly uses.

However, he told an Argentinian newspaper in May he had not watched television since 1990.

Last summer, he urged young people not to waste time on the internet.

According to the Independent, he said: "The products of technological progress, which should simplify and improve the quality of life, distract attention away from what is really important".

Is having a computer in your child's room harmful? Let us know your vies in the comments below...

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US Unveils Car That Won't Start When Driver Is Drunk

June 9, 2015, 3:58 am
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The US have unveiled a car that will potentially stop drink drivers taking to the roads.

At a Department of Transport event in Washington D.C., the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) showed off a prototype fitted with two different types of Driver Alcohol Detection System for Safety (DADSS) technology that can 'sense' the driver's level of intoxication.

One form of the technology works likes a standard breath analyser positioned in the steering wheel or the car door while the other is a touch sensor, also located in the steering wheel or gear stick that scans the driver's blood-alcohol content.

antidrink driving cars

If the car detects that the driver is over the limit, it won't start.

READ MORE:


The project, a collaboration between Automotive Coalition for Traffic Safety (ACTS) and the NHTSA, should be completed in the next five years after which it could be introduced as an extra add-on that car buyers can purchase.

us unveils antidrink driving cars

NHTSA Administrator Rosekind said: “DADSS has enormous potential to prevent drunk driving in specific populations such as teen drivers and commercial fleets, and making it an option available to vehicle owners would provide a powerful new tool in the battle against drunk driving deaths.”


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The Brain During An Argument - Which Side Are You?

June 9, 2015, 3:59 am
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Arguments are a way of life. We live, we love, we argue, we make up. Sometimes though, arguments cause breakage - of relationships, families and people.

The more we can understand about how we argue, the more deliberate we can be in responding to conflict in such a way as to preserve the relationship.

Research has made it clear that the way we argue carries more heft in determining relationship quality than whether or not we argue, or how much. Fighting filthy will bring a relationship undone. Fighting fair will keep the connection close and intact.

People and families have a characteristic way of fighting and each is fed by a different part of the brain. New research is challenging people to look at the way their brain influences how they fight, with a view to learning more adaptive ways to engage in conflict and avoid the scalding heat of battle.

The Scottish Centre for Conflict Resolution has developed a test for this very purpose. The 'Monkey vs Lizard' quiz was designed to give people a better idea of what part of their brain they are using when they argue. It's a quick quiz (like, 10 questions quick) and is based around solid research. With the information, people are better positioned to make deliberate choices around how they 'do' conflict. Awareness of a different way to do things is key to opening up options and inviting a new way of being.

Monkey Brain vs Lizard Brain. Wait. What?

There are two parts of the brain that are called into play during an argument. The Old Brain (the lizard) is the primal 'fight or flight' response. It's all action and not a lot of thought. The other is the New Brain (the monkey) and involves cognitive (thought) processes such as empathy, reflection and understanding.

The Old Brain is driven to protect us from threat, by physically preparing us to fight for our life or run for it. It can come in handy when there's, say, a bus hurtling towards us and we need to get out of the way. It's not so handy when the issue is that of Oreos, or more specifically, that someone has taken the last one.

When there's no need for a physical response (no need to fight or flee), cortisol (the stress hormone) builds up. When this happens, the thinking part of the New Brain that empathises, reflects and understands, gets sidelined in favour of the more primitive, automatic, unthinking part. As a result, there's likely to be yelling, personal sledging and aggression. Nobody listens and nobody is heard. Disrespect will be a hallmark.

The New Brain on the other hand is the thinker. When this part of the brain is at the helm, we're likely to slow things down before we respond, check things out, reason, listen, reflect, empathise and communicate. When the New Brain drives behaviour, people feel heard, validated and understood.

This doesn't mean everyone agrees - not at all. What it means is that people and points of view are respected and relationships remain intact. There's less 'agro' and more respect.

An Easy Way to Calm the Lizard.

The first step to bringing harmony to relationships is being aware that there is a different way to do things. With this awareness, behaviour becomes less automatic and there's an opening up of choices about how to respond and how to 'be'.

If a battle feels looming, one of the ways to engage the new, thinking part of the brain and calm the old, primal part of the brain is by deep, slow breathing. This lowers cortisol levels and reverses the fight or flight response. It's why taking short space from each other before things overheat is important. It lets the Old Brain (the lizard) disengage and the New Brain (the monkey) come into play.

And finally ...

Conflict is a way of life, particularly in families. In a house with flourishing, independent, curious minds it's going to happen.

When kids are involved, it's good to know they've been brought up to think for themselves and to know their own mind. When you raise independent minds who are strong, independent and questioning, there are going to be times when those minds differ and clash - but the clash doesn't have to be a fiery one.

The same goes for any relationship. We're all different, with our own minds, our own wants, needs, loves, hates, desires and fears. Though it's hard to be grateful for that when the acquiescence of those we love would make things so much easier, the truth is that these differences are the essence of being human. What the connection with other depends on is the way the conflict plays out.

When people are not heard, acknowledged and validated, relationships fall apart. All change starts with awareness. Being open to change and the impact we have on people, when we're fighting or otherwise, is the essence of healthy relating and the key to healthy, full relationships.

(Image Credit: Shutterstock)
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Victoria Beckham Dresses: See The Entire Pre Spring/Summer 16 Collection

June 9, 2015, 4:04 am
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Victoria Beckham's dresses have been spotted on A-listers and style editors alike, and her new pre spring/summer 16 collection looks set to be just as successful.

The pop star turned fashion designer has just unveiled her latest line and it seems she's wasting no time in adding her sartorial styles into her enviable (and probably bursting) wardrobe.

victoria beckham

The 41-year-old mother-of-four was spotted out and about this week in a number of pieces from her new ready-to-wear range, including this standout printed red maxi dress featuring her trademark oversized button details.

In a move away from Beckham's signature minimalist style, the pre spring/summer 16 collection incorporates bold prints in her much-loved pillar box red hue.

The new line also features a series of stunning dresses in sleek silhouettes, which will surely be snapped up by the brand's celebrity fans such as Blake Lively and Eva Longoria.

victoria beckham

Beckham has also designed key daywear pieces, including outerwear and separates perfect for layering, along with red carpet worthy party-wear.

Beckham's pre spring/summer 16 collection will launch in two separate drops and aims to provide something for every occasion, city or climate.

victoria beckham

The former Spice Girl has also revealed that she is interested in collaborating with high street store H&M on a clothing range to make designer garments more accessible.

In an interview with The Cut magazine, she said: "I'd like to work on clothing pricing and I'd like to reach more people, and I would like to offer clothes to people who don't want to pay designer prices.

"I would love to do something like [a H&M collaboration]. I want to reach out to that customer."

HuffPost UK Style asked H&M whether a collaboration with Beckham was likely, but they said they were unable to comment on the matter.

View the whole collection here:



SEE ALSO:

Three Reasons Banning Skinny Models Isn't The Answer

Sarah Jessica Parker Launches Bridal Shoes (And They're Just Like Carrie's)

Why Today Is The Day You Should Buy A Bikini
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Men And Women Reveal 10 Things That The Opposite Sex Will Never Understand

June 9, 2015, 4:06 am
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There are also moments when members of the opposite sex can leave us well and truly baffled - whether that's men spending hours on the loo or women and their mind-boggling menstrual cycles.

So what happens when you ask the internet (aka Reddit) to reveal what members of the opposite sex will never, ever understand?

Ladies and gents, feast your eyes on this...

men and women reddit

Things that men will never understand, according to women

1. The horror of feeling a sneeze coming on when you're on your period.
via piratename223

2. Being able to somehow be a size 0 and also a size 8 because women's clothing sizes are completely arbitrary.
via messykatie

3. Shaving. We have to shave SO MUCH, because a lot of us are just as furry as you are...
via KelseyTheGreat

4. How incredibly horny you get on your period yet it is too messy to have enjoyable sex.
via bri_pls

5. Having to worry about blood soaking your underwear and pants.
via iownaguardfish

6. I seriously have no fucking clue what I want to eat for dinner.
via Mixtapeshuffle

7. How much boobs can get in the way of everyday activities.
via traceyh415

8. Sometimes you don't get ready just to look good for them, sometimes you do it for yourself or for other girls.
via cbino

9. Going from being underestimated because you're a child to being underestimated because you're a woman.
via JackieOsSunglasses

10. The pressure to look good always. Men think this is exaggerated, but they also perpetuate it which is confusing.
via yellowbumpercars

SEE ALSO:

Women Reveal The Most Inappropriate Things Guys Have Said After Sex (And It's Super Cringe)

Things Parents Know About Their Kids Reddit Thread Is The Funniest Thing On The Internet


Things that women will never understand, according to men

1. Sometimes there really is nothing that is bothering us.
via qoskymotto0

2. People implying that you are unfortunately stuck with your child for the day. I'm not babysitting my kid, she's mine, I'm hers, I am just being her dad.
via Mexicantdie

3. Accidental boners. Or there are some times where, despite aiming, the stream gets divided and goes everywhere.
via TheIronIcarus

4. That I don't need to spend 45 minutes taking a dump, I simply want to.
via dontsaypoop

5. When your dong touches the toilet seat. Aka the witches kiss.
via BEAVS69

6. The brotherhood that we feel from our joint experience of being hit in the balls.
via RichardLOD

7. We get hurt by their actions/inactions too.
via bobvex

8. When girls "play" punch it can hurt, when done repeatedly it hurts more.
via redhorizon75

9. The need to reposition your balls while walking.
via s1apshot

10. If you give us a problem, you will get a solution. If you don't want a solution, then state that. Otherwise, we're going to try and solve the problem.
via tedediah

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